The Rocker, The Shocker, and The Show Stopper
by yomomma222
Summary: With Nationals right around the corner, Mr. Schue comes up with a plan to bring home the trophy.  A plan that involves three different ways to wow the judges and bring Rachel and Puck closer.
1. Chapter 1

_**Just started reading a few of these so I'm not sure if this has been done yet…don't mean to offend anyone if it has…just had an idea I wanted to get out of my head. **_

Will Schuester walked into the Glee Club practice with a sense of purpose. He laid in bed last night trying to think of the perfect way to win Nationals when it finally hit him at 3:23am. He shot up and went straight to his notebook then to the internet in search of sheet music.

"The Rocker, The Shocker, and The Show Stopper!" He exclaimed barely having entered the practice room, waving the sheet music above his head, "But, not necessarily in that order." The students who didn't have their jaws unhinged choked on their laughter and only one was confused as to why it was such a humorous statement.

"I don't get it." Rachel stated, looking around the room at her fellow glee-clubbers, feeling left out and uncomfortable.

Puck leaned into her and whispered, "I'll explain later." She didn't know why it gave her a chill when she felt his breath tickle her ear. She decided that there must be a draft in the room and left it at that.

Will continued with his explanation, "It is our three pronged plan to win Nationals."

"Um…no offence Mr. Schue, but I really don't see how something like…" Finn raised his eyebrows, searching for the right word that wouldn't get him into trouble, "…_that_ will help us win Nationals."

"You will. First, we have The Rocker." He proceeded to pass out sheet music to everyone but Rachel and Puck, "An Aerosmith medley."

"I get a lead." Mercedes smiled.

"It's not a lead if we're both singing it." Santana corrected her as they discovered they would share '_Walk This Way'_.

"_Dude Looks Like a Lady_…cool…wait." Sam looked up confused at the song he would be sharing with Finn and Artie, "You're not trying to tell me something, are you Mr. Schue?"

"_Love In An Elevator_? Don't you think these song choices are a little risqué?" Quinn asked, eying her sheet music with Finn's arm draped over her shoulders.

Tina piped up, not willing to let Quinn take away the first real solo she'd had in competition, "_Love In An Elevator _is like my favorite song. I'll sing it by myself if Quinn doesn't want to join me."

"Thank you for your enthusiasm Tina but I partnered everyone up with who I thought they would complement best. You and Quinn will be singing it together. Quinn, is the song choice going to be a problem?"

She eyed the others who were shaking their heads at her, "I guess not."

"Great. Mike, Brittany, get started on the choreography. Lauren, you have a lot of confidence and great ideas, so I want you to help them." Lauren smiled, happy to help and glad to not have a solo. She was a bold woman but, singing in front of hundreds of people by herself was not something on her top ten list of things to do before she died.

"What about me Mr. Schuester?" Rachel asked, looking like a puppy who had been kicked repeatedly then left out in a rain storm and not fed for days.

"She means, what about _us_?" Puck corrected her, hands in the pockets of his hoodie leaning back in his chair.

Will smiled proudly, "You two…" He lifted his hands as if to accentuate the words, "…are The Show Stopper." Rachel smiled brightly and sat up straighter, "I want to see the two of you after practice with Mike and Brittany."

"Is this some kind of secret?" Finn asked, not sure why Puck would get the male lead in a song with Rachel. He was with Quinn now but, last he checked, feature songs with Rachel were his thing.

"Not a secret, I just want to make sure they can pull it off before we bring everyone else into it." He paced the room, "Now, I was wracking my brain, trying to come up with The Shocker…something that no one has ever done before…something that will leave everyone else in the dust and prove that we're the best. But, it was pretty late and I couldn't focus so I brainstormed with a friend this morning and she told me she might have an idea. That being said, assisting us with The Shocker will be Ms. Pillsbury."

Puck leaned in again and mumbled to Rachel, who still had no idea what a shocker was outside of the obvious definition, to startle or surprise, "Never thought I'd live to hear that." There was that chill again. She resolved herself to speaking to Mr. Schuester after class about the room temperature. It had to be just right in order to create the optimum environment for vocal cords.

She and Puck had recently become friends, bonding due to a Bachelor Auction put on by their Temple to benefit the rebuilding efforts for the Youth Center. No one is sure what caused it to erupt into flames and anyone who might know, isn't talking. He didn't want to be on the auction block. His mother forced him into it and he'd be damned if he was going to let some cougar snatch him up with her husband's money. He was over the older woman thing and had set his sights on someone significantly less wrinkly and much cuter. There was still his relationship with Lauren to deal with but he had been gradually building up the courage to break things off with her for a few weeks. Sure he was the resident school badass, and anyone who said otherwise would end up in a dumpster, but Lauren Zizes was one scary chick.

He persuaded Rachel to bid on him, stopping his mother's heart in the process at the prospect of her son finally bringing home a nice Jewish girl. She had been scouting Rachel Berry as a daughter in law ever since they attended daycare together at Kosher Kiddies when they were two. He offered to pay her back, especially considering she had to spend quite a bit to outbid Dr. Weinstein's wife, and he would swear he saw his mother slide a wad of cash to Rachel under the table when the bidding got particularly heated. For some reason, she refused his offer to forget the whole thing happened and told him, with her head held high and that cute smile she threw around without even knowing the power it held, "I paid for a date with Noah Puckerman and a date with Noah Puckerman is what I'll get." Who was he to argue with her?

Puck was never good at dating or relationships but, when he was with Rachel for a whole week, he tried to be. Aside from Lauren, it was the hardest he had ever tried for anyone and he kind of liked it. The way she rinsed the slushy from his hair, the way her little body fit under his when they made out in her room, the fact that she pushed him to do his homework before said making out was ever permitted to start, how she encouraged him to study for a test with boob grazing as a reward.

He liked Lauren, but she never expected much out of him. She actually tried to make trouble for him what with the whole sex tape idea and telling him to blow off his school work to take her to the drive-thru or encouraging him to keep going to his fight club. You can be damn sure that if Rachel Berry ever found out he was still doing that, she'd roll up into the warehouse, threaten to call mothers or wives or whatever, until everyone ran home with their tails between their legs, then drag him out by his ear. He liked that too…and he missed it.

So, when he was indebted to her with a date, he decided he was going to give her her money's worth. He'd deny his actions if anyone on the football team asked about it. He did have a rep to maintain but he also knew he didn't want to blow another chance with Rachel. This wasn't just going to be another Breadstix dine and dash then sex in the back of his truck date. This was going to be a "Make Rachel Berry forget who the hell Finn Hudson is and, in the process, realize she might have feelings for Noah Puckerman" date. He even recruited the help of his mother. She beamed with pride and proceeded to go on and on about vegan something and a picnic basket she found at the store a few months ago because, "You know, just in case an occasion such as this should ever present itself."

When he pulled up in her drive way, wearing a nice pair of jeans and a button up shirt, he got out of the truck, holding a single wildflower he pulled over on the side of the road to pick, walked to the door, and knocked instead of slamming on the horn until she came out. One of her fathers answered and actually shook his hand before turning over his shoulder and calling Rachel. She flew down the steps, in a flowery sundress, and stopped suddenly when she took in his entire appearance. He wasn't sure but he thought she might have gasped.

He awkwardly shot out the hand holding the flower to her, "I…uh…saw this and thought you might like it or whatever." He didn't know if it was the lighting or what but he could have sworn her eyes started misting over. Great, he made her cry.

"Thank you Noah." She smiled at him, "It's beautiful."

Her father cleared his throat, breaking them both from the trance they had been in, "I think you two should be going. Have her home by ten."

"Yes sir." Puck nodded, having no idea where 'Sir' came from but figured it must have been from never having met the father of one of his 'dates' before. It was nice in an uncomfortable, scary sort of way.

The sun was starting to set when they arrived at the park. He ran to her side of the truck, opened her door for her, and even offered his hand to help her out, surprised to see her still holding on to her flower. Puck then congratulated himself at being pretty good at the whole gentleman thing and remembering everything his mother and sister had told him to do. When she saw him grab the picnic basket, he was certain he heard another gasp and fought the goofy grin struggling to make it's way to the surface. He was still the Puckersaurus Rex, after all. Guys like him didn't break out into goofy grins over impressing a girl, they smirked slyly once they got into said girls panties. She linked her arm with his and allowed him to lead her a spot in the grass. He laid a blanket down and pulled out the Tupperware containers of food his mother helped him prepare. There was that smile again when he explained everything they were eating was completely vegan. They talked, laid back and stared at the stars, laughed and even stayed in a comfortable silence for a short while.

Things came to a screeching halt when she felt the need to say, "I've had a great time tonight, Noah. Lauren is a very lucky girl."

Lauren…right. He almost forgot they were still together but, apparently, Rachel hadn't. It could have been worse. At least she didn't bring up that ass hat Finnessa and the many reasons why he should still be in love with her. Puck decided, then and there, that he was going to do things right, break up with Lauren first, then ask Rachel out again on another date. If he could find a way to make that date better than this one and it resulted in Rachel Berry on her back with her legs spread, hey…all the better.

He just had no idea how difficult breaking up with Lauren Zizes would be. In the few weeks following their date, Puck continued to spend time with Rachel. He convinced Lauren to sit with her and the other gleeks at lunch, gave her a ride home from school when Lauren had her mixed martial arts class, and watched movies at her house a few times, not minding that her dads sat in the room with them. They were actually pretty cool and one even talked about giving himself a Mohawk. No one could ever say badassness wasn't contagious. Hell, if it weren't for the thought of Lauren hanging over his head, he'd say he and Rachel were practically an item already.

And damn if he didn't even know whether she wanted to be with him or if she was still hung up on Hudson. Finn was something they never talked about and he preferred it that way. He knew, should he ever get together with Rachel, everyone including his ex-best friend would give him crap over it but, to be with someone who made him feel good about himself for once, someone who made him want to stretch his aspirations beyond the city limits of Lima, it was going to be worth it. Besides, nailing a virgin is always epic. He felt the need to keep balancing queer thoughts out with dirty ones, just to remind himself of the fact that he was still a BAMF.

He was pulled from his thoughts when Lauren tugged on his sleeve, "Make your secret meeting quick. I need you to take me to the mall." He exhaled in defeat and nodded, still unsure of how to break things off with her then turn around and start chasing Rachel without getting his (or Rachel's) ass kicked in the process.

When the majority of the Glee Club cleared out, Puck, Rachel, Mike, and Brittany approached the front of the room to finally find out what Mr. Schuester was planning for them. It wasn't a moment too soon because Rachel looked like she was about to spontaneously combust from the excitement of the unknown.

Will looked at the group, "Show choir has always been about big production numbers filled with intricate choreography and elaborate costumes…but we're going to strip all that away-"

"We're going to be naked?" Puck asked, still not sure of where this was going, but liking the prospect of being naked with Rachel. Naked with Mike, not so much. Being a gentleman is alright but, he was still Puck after all. His daydreams didn't center around hand holding and dancing in a field of daisies, they centered around two smoking hot Jews sweating and panting each other's names. If cuddling and pet names came along with that then he was willing to make the sacrifice.

Will stared at him, mouth slightly open for a brief moment, "No. We're going to do a number that centers around emotion. Raw and pure…to be specific, longing. I want graceful movements, simple costumes. It will be something they're not expecting."

"And you chose us?" Even Puck wasn't sure why he was chosen for this over Finn.

"Well, I obviously need Mike and Brittany to choreograph what I have in mind but I need you two to be able to convince the audience that you want each other more than anything else. That there's no one on this earth who you would rather be with. That Rachel ends where Puck begins and vice versa and I don't just mean the cheesy smiles and hand holding that Rachel and Finn have done in the past." Puck glanced at Rachel to see her reaction at the mention of Finn's name. He smirked when she didn't even flinch, just listened eagerly to Mr. Schuester as he continued, "I need you to make them think you're completely and totally in love with one another. If you two can do that, this will be a Show Stopper the likes of which no ones ever seen." He smiled proudly at the group.

"I think we can do that Mr. Schue." It was Puck who spoke for the group as the others nodded in agreement.

Will held his smile, certain that this was going to be their year, "Great." He reached into his bang and pulled out the sheet music, handing a copy to Puck and Rachel. He then gave Mike and Brittany each a CD with the song on it, "See what you can come up with this weekend."


	2. Chapter 2

Puck was disappointed when he saw how sad Rachel was when he had to turn down her suggestion of practice that night. He gritted his teeth in frustration as he told her he had already made plans to take Lauren to the mall.

"Oh." There was that damn misting in her eyes again as she spoke quickly, refusing to look at him again, "Well, have fun. Maybe we can practice this weekend sometime." She didn't give him a chance to reply as she grabbed her bag and headed straight for the door. Maybe tonight was the night to end things with Lauren.

Speaking of, she was waiting for him outside of the choir room, leaning against a row of lockers, "Ready to go Puckerman?"

"Yeah," He slumped his shoulders and took the hand she held out to him, listening to her go on about the guy who's arm she had broken in gym class.

"I thought you were square dancing in gym."

"We are, I guess I just got a little carried away. I don't think I know my own strength." He gulped, "So, what's the deal with Schue's Show Stopper?"

"Just a song he wants me and Berry to sing together."

"Why didn't he pick Finn?"

"Dunno."

"He's just usually Rachel's go to guy. They're always the ones to come together and win the crowd over with their googly eyes and believing in each other and all that crap."

"I guess." There she was not thinking he could be just as good as Finn, better even. When Rachel found out he was going to be her partner, she didn't hesitate to tell him how excited she was and how great they were going to sound together. She did say something about not worrying, that she'd adjust her range to match his so she didn't make him look bad, but that was just Berry being Berry.

They finished at the mall early enough that Puck found himself on Rachel's doorstep, holding a soy latte in one hand and his guitar in the other by 7pm. He sat the guitar down and knocked, only waiting a few seconds before Daddy came to the door. He had spent enough time with them recently to know the difference between Dad and Daddy. Both men liked him but Daddy was a trouble maker in school and had a particular soft spot for him.

"Noah! Good to see you." He smiled brightly.

"Hi, Mr. Berry, is Rachel home?" Puck asked, picking up his guitar just to have his question answered by the girl herself.

"Who is it Daddy?" Rachel asked, appearing in the doorway. She was surprised to see him standing there, "Noah. What are you doing here?"

"I finished with Lauren early so I thought I'd come by to see if you were still up for practicing." He decided he would leave out the part where they bumped into Mike and Tina and even they questioned why Puck was chosen over Finn for a part with Rachel. When she just stared at him, he got nervous, "I mean, if you're busy, I can go. I should have called first. Shit." His eyes grew when he realized his slip in front of Rachel's father. When did he start caring about this crap? "Sorry…oh, I got you this." He handed her the latte, "I'll just see you in school on Monday." He turned to leave.

"Noah." He spun around quickly, "Have you had dinner yet?"

"Not yet. I came straight here after I took Lauren home."

"You should come in and eat with us. Then we can go practice." He exhaled in relief.

"I'll go set an extra place at the table." Daddy smiled at him.

Rachel stepped back, allowing Puck to walk into the home. She took his guitar, lightly grazing his fingers with her own in the process, and placed it down in the corner.

"I made vegan lasagna. We can heat something else up for you if you'd prefer."

"No!" The volume of his reply startled them both. He calmed down, "You made it. I'm sure it's great." He'd never admit it but the vegan food he and his mother made for their date wasn't terrible.

She smiled at him and gently wrapped her fingers around his wrist, "Dining room is this way." He knew where it was and he knew she knew he knew where it was. It wasn't his first meal in the Berry house, but he wasn't going to stop her from touching him. Hell, she could show him where the dining room was in his own house if it meant her slender fingers tangled up in his. And, holy shit, how did she get her hand so soft?

Their dining room table had six chairs. He wasn't sure why three people needed six chairs but he was glad to see that she chose to sit right next to him. He felt her leg bump his under the table and saw her blush just before she apologized but, it was as if she kept forgetting he was sitting there because it continued to happen throughout dinner. He counted eight times and once, her elbow touched his for twelve seconds. What kind of a pussy was he turning into that he was counting the number of times clothed limbs touched one another? He had literally lost track of all the chicks he had banged and now only kept a record of the ones who were worth hitting again when their husbands or fathers weren't home. Of course, he hadn't visited that list since just before he started seeing Lauren and he had no desire to ever see it again since he realized he was in lo…like with Rachel Berry.

Now, they were finishing dinner and he was offering to do the dishes. He couldn't figure out what was going on with him but he would be lying if he said he didn't like it…a lot. Dad and Daddy just thanked him for the offer and said they'd clean up since Rachel cooked, then sent them up to her room to practice. He wasn't sure if their trust was placed in him or her but he wasn't going to pass up a chance to be in Rachel Berry's room again.

Two hours later, both teens were feeling frustrated. Rachel with Puck's inability to connect to the role and Puck with his wanting to connect to it, just knowing if he gave it his all, things would get horizontal real quick and he still hadn't broken up with Lauren. He liked his arms unbroken. Plus he didn't want to scare Rachel away by being too emotional. There was a fine line and he was having trouble finding it, let alone walking it.

"You're holding back Noah. I don't feel like you're in love with me. You've actually spent the past thirty minutes looking constipated and an hour before that staring at the wall behind my head." Damn, she noticed, "Just pretend your singing to Lauren."

The problem was, to keep things calm in his chest, head, and pants, he had been pretending he was singing to Lauren, "Trust me Rach, I'm trying to."

Rachel looked at her hands for a moment and spoke, "Maybe, Mr. Schuester will consider giving Lauren my part…letting you sing to her might make it easier for you to give it your all."

He was blown away, "You'd do that?"

She finally looked up at him, "For the chance at us winning Nationals? Yes. I don't know if you've noticed Noah, but I've changed a little."

"I've noticed."

"Besides, there's always The Shocker. Maybe I can get in on that."

Puck's eyes widened at the thought then took a minute to calm himself, "This is guaranteed as your moment and I don't want you to give it up. Maybe he can give my spot to Finn."

Rachel scrunched her face in displeasure at his suggestion, "I don't think that would gain the desired effect Mr. Schuester is going for."

"Why not? Everyone else thinks it should be him."

"Everyone else is wrong. Noah, Finn can hardly dance, let alone act. There is no doubt in my mind that the right choice was made in my partner selection." There she goes believing in him again, "While Mr. Schuester can be oblivious to certain things, he does know what he's doing when it comes to song selection. If he didn't, we wouldn't have gotten this far."

He still wasn't convinced, "But, wouldn't it be better for you to sing to someone you had feelings for?"

If possible, her face appeared to be even more disapproving, "My feelings for Finn Hudson disappeared once I finally realized what a hypocrite he was. He couldn't forgive the fact that I kissed you but was willing to forgive Quinn for not only kissing you, but having sex and a baby with you." She covered her mouth and looked away, regretting her words, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought Beth into this."

"No, it's ok. Shelby's been pretty great lately. She sends me pictures and progress reports and a few weeks ago she mentioned the possibility of me seeing her."

"That's great Noah. I'm glad she listened." Again, she looked like she said something she shouldn't have.

"Listened? What? You talked to her for me?"

She twisted her fingers nervously and looked down, "Well, I saw how much you loved that little girl and I knew Shelby knew what it felt like to give a child up and regret it…so I used that and convinced her to consider letting you see her once in a while."

He stared at her in speechless amazement until he was able to regroup, "I think I'm ready to try again…at practicing I mean."

She wasn't sure what brought about the change but was glad for it, "Ok."

He began to play, then sang to her in a way that made her heart melt in a puddle at his feet. She joined in and, when it was over, they found themselves very close, mouths only a few inches apart, eyelids drooping lazily. Rachel was the first to come to her senses and pull away.

"That was great. If we do it like that, Mr. Schuester will be very happy. I should get to bed. I have an early dance class in the morning."

"Right." He ran his hand through his Mohawk, "I need to get going. I forgot to call my mom to tell her I'd be getting home late." He remembered no one knew he was the guy who called his mother because she worried then toughened his exterior, "I mean, I got shit to do…might go light something on fire or go find an old guy to buy me some beer."

Rachel smiled, "Of course. Let me know how either of those goes for you."

She walked him downstairs and to the door, holding it open for him, "Night Rach."

She smiled again, "Goodnight Noah." After she shut the door behind him, she leaned against it and sighed loudly then looked up to see her fathers standing in the entryway to the living room, arms wrapped around each other and smiling knowingly at her. She composed herself and raised her chin, "Excuse me, I have shi…things to do." Maybe spending time with Noah Puckerman was staring to affect her. She ran up the stairs and landed face first on her bed, screaming into a pillow after realizing she had, once again, managed to fall for a guy with a girlfriend. She decided, this time, things were going to be different. She wasn't going to follow him around or try to come between them. Rachel Berry wasn't going to be that girl anymore. Starting Monday, she would do everything she could to stay out of the way of Lauren and Noah.

He sent her texts throughout the weekend, offering to come over and practice again, but she made excuses to avoid each one, dance class, homework, pre-chewing food at the senior center. He then resorted to phone calls and, when she got tired of ignoring them, she turned her phone off. He was making this more difficult than she had anticipated.

When Monday came, she managed to avoid him for the entire school day, going so far as to fake a sprain in gym just to be sent to the nurse and avoid the history class they shared. No one could ever say she was not committed to her plan. But then the time came for Glee Club and she knew, this close to Nationals, there was no way she could miss a second of practice. She decided to go to Mr. Schuester before the club met and explain her predicament to him.

"So you see, I think it's best for everyone involved if I just avoided practicing the song with him."

"Because you think you've fallen in love with him?" He was confused. He had just given them the assignment on Friday and here she was on Monday, already under Puck's spell. If it was any indication of how outstanding the number will be, he was already eager to see it. He picked Puck over Finn for a reason. He was sure Rachel was still hung up on Finn, who looked uncomfortable being in the same room as her, and didn't want things to look completely one sided or awkward during their performance. He knew Puck was a good liar, or else he'd be in prison by now, and that between Rachel's acting and Puck's ability to lie (which is basically acting), they could make it amazing, "Rachel, I understand why you're doing this and I commend you for not wanting to come between your friends but, this is a very serious piece-"

"And you have my absolute guarantee that, when the time comes, I will be completely and utterly in love with Noah on stage. I just think it's a good idea for me to stay away from him until then."

"And how do you propose to do that?"

"Brittany can stand in for me during practice with Noah and she can stand in for Noah when practicing with me."

"Rachel, I don't think-"

"Please, Mr. Schuester. I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important to me." She gave him the sad eyes that she knew no one could resist and he folded.

"You promise me, when you get on that stage at Nationals, the audience will fall in love with you for being in so love with him."

She squealed in excitement, "You have my word."

"Fine." He didn't know why he was agreeing to this, especially since it was mostly based around the fact that Rachel thought she was so desirable she could come between Puck and Lauren. But, in the two years he'd spent with her, he found it easier to just give in. It saved a lot of time and prevented an ulcer flair up by doing so.

"Thank you Mr. Schuester!" She jumped into his arms and hugged him in gratitude.

When Glee Club started, Puck tried not to let it show that he was disappointed when Rachel didn't sit next to him like she had been the past few weeks. In fact, the only way she could be further from him would be if she was in the hallway. He decided to confront her after practice and find out what the hell was going on. Unfortunately, he didn't get the chance because, as soon as practice ended, she was up and out of her seat. For someone with such a small wingspan, she sure could move. By the time he made it to the parking lot, the tires of her Prius were screeching as she sped out onto the street.

He spent the rest of the week trying to corner her but damn if she wasn't like a little ninja, slipping in and out of classrooms unnoticed. He practiced with Brittany and Mike and would go to Rachel's house everyday after school just to be turned away by Daddy, who claimed she wasn't home. Traitor.

After two weeks of silent treatment, one where he tried everything he could think of to get her to talk to him and another where he said to hell with it and attempted to convince himself he didn't need her, he decided to take drastic measures. He waited outside of her house until all the lights went out then crept to the side of the home that her bedroom window was on, climbed the tree just outside of it, and shimmied out onto the limb that was kind of, but not quite, outside of her window. It required a little athleticism and a complete disregard for his own personal safety but he managed to open the window and climb in.

To say she was surprised was an understatement as she proceeded to scream, "To catch a predator!" and hit him repeatedly with what he could only guess was a pillow. Her father's rushed into her room and flipped the light on to see their daughter, in nothing but a pair of underwear and a t-shirt, straddling a defenseless Noah Puckerman on the floor, and wailing away at him with Maggie McGee, the purple stuffed gorilla she'd had since she was six.

"What's going on in here?" Dad asked.

"I'm sorry!" Noah called out, hands still up, guarding his face from another potential attack, "She's been avoiding me for weeks and this was the only way I knew how to get her alone to talk."

"You scared the shit out of me Noah!" Apparently, just thinking about him seemed to be a bad influence on her.

"I'm sorry." He said again suddenly aware of their positioning and her lack of clothes. He noticed she made no effort to get off of him as her father's mumbled to each other.

"You have five minutes. Leave the door open."

"Daddy, I don't think that's a good idea. You should kick him out right this instant and ground me severely for having a boy in my room at such a late hour."

"Five minutes." He said again, trying to conceal a smile before they walked back to their bedroom.

Rachel looked down at Puck, still sitting on top of him and attempted to regain her dignity, "And what can I help you with this evening Noah?" She tried not to be affected by the fact that his hands were now resting on her bare thighs.

"Why have you been avoiding me?"

"I haven't. I've been very busy with other extra curricular activities and, if you had any desire to get into a good college, you'd be doing the same."

"You've been missing our practices." He started rubbing his thumbs back and forth on her thighs.

"I've been in Glee Club." She replied defensively.

"You know that's not the practice I'm talking about."

She struggled to conceal the whimper that his work on her bare skin was trying to bring out, "I'm confident in my ability to nail our number when the time comes. Performers of my stature don't need practice. We merely need a stage and a spotlight."

"I don't get it. Things were fine between us last time we were in this room together, now you're all…distant."

"Like I said, I've been busy."

"Right." He was now lightly grazing both of his hands up and down her thighs and taking note of the fact that her breath was beginning to become uneven. Did she feel the same way he did?

They didn't move, both enjoying their positioning but neither willing to admit it to the other or move until requested to do so. Puck was being straddled by a hot chick and Rachel was quite enjoying the trail of fire he was leaving along her thighs. She rested her hands on his forearms and finally decided to break the long silence, "You picked a very dangerous way to get my attention. You could have hurt yourself and ruined any chance we had at Nationals."

"You're changing the subject." He allowed his hands to creep higher. She wasn't stopping him so why not give it a shot? He could do a lot in whatever was left of their five minutes.

Just as he reached the top of her thighs, she shook herself free of his spell, cleared her throat and stood quickly, "So, now that you know I'm not avoiding you, you should go."

He also stood and just stared at her for a long moment, "Will you be at practice tomorrow?"

"I can't, I'm-"

"Busy." He answered for her. Before they could say anything else, Daddy appeared in the doorway.

"Time to go." Puck slumped his shoulders in defeat then headed back out the way he came in just as Rachel shot her father a pleading look. He got the message, "I don't think the window is necessary Noah. I can let you out the front door."

He gave her one last glance then headed out her door, "See you later Rach."

"Goodnight…Puck." Apparently, she was resorting to desperate measures as well. He tried to pretend it didn't hurt, but it did.


	3. Chapter 3

With Nationals one week away, Emma decided it was time to begin work on The Shocker. The kids had already had several weeks to focus on The Rocker and, from what she understood things were not going smoothly with The Show Stopper, but she was sure they'd get it together in time. She saw Noah Puckerman and Rachel Berry in the hall together just before Will came up with his plan to win Nationals. She watched him genuinely smile down at the girl, as she spoke a mile a minute and gestured wildly with her hands, about something that he probably had no interest in but listened intently to anyway. He then gently pushed a strand of hair behind her ear just before Lauren Zizes came up behind him, put him in a headlock, and pulled him away mid noogie. She then found herself wondering when Noah Puckerman, juvenile delinquent with a hard as nails demeanor, started showing his emotions in a way that didn't involve violence or arson. A moment like that can't be faked and would certainly come through in their performance.

She stood in the hallway outside of the choir room with Will. He didn't know why he had to leave the room for her portion of the coaching, "I'm asking you to trust me Will."

"I do trust you Emma. I just don't get why I can't be there to observe their progress."

"Because, it's better if you're not involved." He narrowed his eyes, unsure of what that meant. Was there going to be rule breaking involved? Her eyes took on a look of pleading and he knew she won. First he was giving in to Rachel over The Show Stopper, now he was giving in to Emma over The Shocker. He was starting to question his effectiveness as the coach of this club. She smiled at him once she knew she had gotten her way, "It will be great. I promise." He nodded and left reluctantly as Emma turned and walked back into the choir room, "Ok, everyone. Today we begin work on The Shocker." Once again, most of the room laughed but, this time, Rachel wasn't the only one who didn't get it, "Now, I've recruited a little help. I hope you don't mind." She walked back to the doorway and called down the hall, "Gentlemen."

As she re-entered the room, she was followed shortly by Kurt, then Blaine, then one prep school boy after another.

"The Warblers?" Rachel asked, not sure where this was going.

"Yes. The jazz band will not be involved in The Shocker. It's going to be true a capella and The Warblers are here to help you perfect that."

"I don't get it. What's so shocking about singing something without a band?" Finn asked.

"We'll get to that later. But, for now, boys." She gestured to the group behind her.

Blaine stepped forward, "Tenors go with Chad, bass with Tyler, altos with Marcus, and sopranos with Steven. Now, I'm going to need someone who can beat box for percussion…" Mike stepped forward, "Perfect, go with Justin. Kurt and I will walk around and check everyone's progress, then we'll come together and see what we've got."

"What about choreography?" Mike asked.

"Won't be necessary." Emma answered.

"But, Ms. Pillsbury, without choreography-"

Mercedes didn't get to finish her statement before Emma raised her hand to cut her off, "You'll be just fine without it."

The club looked around at each other, unsure of what was going on, then gave in just as quickly as Will had to the woman. She may be tiny and OCD'd out but that was what made her scary. The song she had them practicing was Billy Joel's "_We Didn't Start The Fire_". It was difficult but most of them were doing well with their assignment and Finn was relieved there was no dancing involved. Puck seemed to be having trouble concentrating as he watched Rachel with her group. He had to fight the urge to fly across the room and snatch her away from Jack…Spencer…Waldo…whatever the hell the guy's name was, when she laughed at something the douche bag said then slid her hand down his arm. Damn it if she didn't look adorable when she laughed like that. Eyes lit up, mouth open, shoulders shaking up and down. It was a laugh that affected the whole room and he knew that because, everyone around her started laughing too. By everyone, he meant the other preppy boy banders that surrounded her. Assholes.

By the end of practice, Emma had finally explained the plan to them and asked if they were alright with the potential moral implications. As a Guidance Counselor, she wasn't sure if she should be suggesting this idea but, winning meant a lot to Will and she realized, after sabotaging her own marriage, she'd do anything for him. Rachel was surprised when everyone in the room turned to her for direction and found herself wondering when she became the one they looked to for answers. The girl knew her choice but she also knew the choice everyone else wanted her to go with. Deciding to side with them, she answered, "I think any cheating we might be doing will be balanced out by the fact that there's a tremendous risk involved, especially considering it has a slim chance at actually working." She glanced around the room at the faces who still didn't know what she was saying, "I say we go for it." They all tipped their heads up and made a noise that signified they finally understood her and smiled.

"You can't tell Mr. Schuester. I don't want him to have any knowledge of the plan for deniability purposes. The Warblers will continue to work with you this week and I believe Blaine and Kurt have volunteered to accompany you to New York as consultants." The room erupted in excitement, everyone glad Kurt would be rejoining them, even if it was in an unofficial capacity.

"Whatever, I'm just trying to get to New York. If it's on the back of New Directions then, so be it." Kurt tried to play it cool but was inwardly doing back flips at the thought of taking this trip with his friends.

A short while later, Rachel was standing in the hallway with Blaine and Kurt talking animatedly about wardrobe options when they were disrupted from their brainstorming.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't the Queen Homo himself. Or, should I say herself?" David Karofsky stepped toward them menacingly.

"Why don't you go drag your knuckles somewhere else?" Blaine countered, sticking up for his boyfriend.

"Who's this? Your knight in shining Lacroix?"

Rachel stepped in front of her friends and into Karofsky's face, "Your blatant homophobia isn't fooling anyone. You think making fun of Kurt and Blaine makes you look tougher when, in reality, all it does is confirm the fact that you're confused about your own sexuality and that you even know the name Christian Lacroix and said it correctly solidifies my argument."

Karofsky took an angry step toward Rachel and that was as far as the situation was permitted to go before a fist flew forward and slammed into his face, causing him to drop to the ground. Rachel looked up to see Puck standing over him with his fist still balled up, "Touch her again and see what happens." Even Kurt and Blaine were surprised by his actions. She stared at Puck, his jaw clenched and body rigid, both of them breathing heavily for different reasons. Now, Rachel Berry was not one to condone violence but she had to admit, just to herself and no one else…ever, that was the hottest thing she had seen in her life and it was doing things to her body that she was embarrassed to be feeling.

"What's going on here?" Principal Figgins disrupted the scene as Karofsky stood up, holding his nose while blood dripped from it.

"Puckerman punched me."

Figgins looked at the boy for confirmation. When Puck didn't deny it, he continued, "My office." Puck looked back at his friends and went to follow the principal until he felt those soft fingers around his wrist again, holding him back. The next thing he knew, Rachel Berry was standing protectively in front of him and he couldn't help but take the time to appreciate the smell of her hair. He wasn't sure what the scent was but damn if he didn't love it…like it…aw, screw it…he was beyond denying he was in love with everything about this chick.

She knew that, with his record, he'd be kicked out of school for this and did the only thing she could think to do, "Puck didn't hit him." Still with the Puck? What's a guy got to do to get back to being called Noah? "I did." Say what?

"Shut it Berry. It's not worth you getting into trouble." Puck said to her over her shoulder.

She glanced back at him and spoke so only he could hear her, "No. He's not worth you getting kicked out of school over." She returned her attention to Principal Figgins, "It was me."

"No, it was Puck." Karofsky didn't know what was going on but he also knew this move would get his teammate kicked out of school and that's what he was aiming for.

Rachel nudged Kurt with her elbow, looking for him to back her up, "She's lying." He said, head held high.

Rachel's eyes grew wide in betrayal, "Kurt!" She turned back to Figgins, "He's trying to protect me."

"No I'm not…" He looked down at Rachel then back up, "She's trying to protect me. I hit him." Kurt glared at Karofsky in defiance.

"No he didn't. I hit him." Blaine stepped forward and Kurt looked at him with the same awestruck expression that was on his face the day they met.

"You're all straight trippin'. I did it and I'd hit that punk again." Mercedes stepped out of the choir room, arms crossed, hip jutted out.

"I find that hard to believe Ms. Jones, since you just arrived on the scene."

"Yeah, well…that's how bad of a bitch she is." Santana joined the party and rested her arm on Mercedes' shoulder, "But she only did it because I told her to. That's how bad of a bitch I am." They both snapped their fingers and snaked their necks at the same time. The two girls smirked at one another.

Finn and Quinn stepped out of the room to see what was going on and Figgins noticed their presence, "I suppose you managed to hit Mr. Karofsky as well."

"No." Finn looked around with confused eyes and asked with hesitation, "Did you want me to?"

Principal Figgins weighed his options then decided, "Well, without knowing the true culprit, I don't think there's anything I can do in this situation." He may be a disciplinarian but, if David Karofsky was attacked, he probably deserved it. The Glee Club sighed in relief, "If it happens again, however, you'll all be suspended and that means no trip to New York for any of you." Their relief was replaced with worry as the principal turned and walked back to his office.

The group stood in front of Karofsky, waiting for him to make a move. Well, most of the teens waited defensively, Finn continued to look confused. There was a brief moment where Karofsky looked like he was going to say or do something but it faded quickly and he simply walked away, making sure to spit the word "Freaks" at them as he passed. Rachel continued to stand in front of Puck, in an effort to keep him from going after the bully. Once the threat was no longer present, he placed his hand on her hip and forehead against the back of her head, inhaling deeply, unsure of when he'd get the chance to have her this close again.

"Puckerman!" His head shot up as Lauren came out of the room, startling everyone in the hallway, "You ready to go or what?"

He cleared his throat, "Yeah." His insides danced at the fact that, just before he removed his hand from her hip, Rachel briefly let her fingers wrap around his hand and squeeze quickly, without looking back at him. He was definitely breaking up with Lauren...soon. She let go and walked away with Blaine and Kurt, who were still buzzing from the excitement of what had just happened. She didn't mean to do it but she found herself unable to control the urge to touch him.

A few days later found him in the auditorium and still dating Lauren. He was going to break up with her the night before. The words were on the tip of his tongue, he even had a confidence booster earlier in the day when a group of Freshmen jumped out of his way when he walked toward them in the cafeteria. They threw their lunch money at him and one went so far as to jump into the trash compactor to avoid him. He was simply going to tell one of kids that he dropped a notebook but he was twelve dollars richer and had a renewed sense of badassness. He was Noah Puckerman, the biggest BAMF (literally) McKinley High had ever and will ever have walk the halls. And here he was afraid to break up with some chick and go after the one he really wanted. That's right. Go after her, get her, do dirty things to her with a disregard for where they were or who was watching, then maybe cuddle a little after.

He suddenly felt ashamed of himself for his cowardice until Lauren started going on about how she had an 'Oh Shit' moment a few hours prior when she _might_ have killed her wrestling partner in practice. It would seem she squeezed a little too hard and he just stopped moving…seriously, he stopped breathing and everything. He was this close to being pronounced dead when, Coach Sylvester, who just happened to be passing through the gym took in the scene, said, "No one asked permission to die today", placed her hand on his chest then, suddenly, he opened his eyes and gasped for breath. No shit…well, maybe it was just a rumor but no one was coming forward with evidence to the contrary. Puck wanted to be relieved that Lauren hadn't killed someone but a small part of him knew her going to jail was the only break up strategy with non-violent repercussions for him.

And here he was, watching Rachel on stage with Mike and Brittany, practicing their song. Brittany doing the thing he'd been dying to do for weeks, OK, it was one of the very few PG things he'd been wanting to do for weeks. He tended to keep the thoughts of other things limited to his bedroom, at night, once his mother and sister had gone to bed. She wrapped her arms around Rachel and sang in her ear, Rachel giggling every time, "You're starting to make me feel like you're not attracted to me." Brittany stated, looking hurt and insecure.

Rachel wiped the grin from her face, "I'm sorry. You're very desirable Brittany."

"Damn right she is." Santana called from her seat in the audience.

She tried to ease the girl's feelings, "You know what I think my problem is? I'm too attracted to you and Santana is watching. It's making this very difficult for me." She heard Santana fight a laugh and Puck chuckled despite still being upset about her avoiding him. Just after the Bachelor Auction, when Puck and Rachel grew closer, Santana and Brittany managed to get their act together. It took Artie seeing how attached at the hip the girls were and Sam dropping numerous hints about lesbianism and how, "Attached at the hip" they were but he finally got it and set the former cheerleader free. The next day, she stepped through the halls on Santana's arm, both smiling widely. Not surprisingly, Santana had become a kinder, gentler Latina as a result.

"Well," Puck stepped forward and Rachel shot her nervous eyes up to meet his, "Since we're both here, and your obviously not busy changing adult diapers at the retirement home, maybe we can get an actual practice in." He dropped his back pack and kept his gaze steady on her.

Rachel panicked, "Um…" She looked around to the people she thought of as friends (whether they felt the same or not), hoping one of them would save her. Mike had no idea what was going on, Brittany was staring at the ceiling, swaying to music that wasn't even playing, and Santana was watching with interest that was normally reserved for _All My Children_ and, damn them for cancelling that shit. She had no choice, "Alright. That's a good idea."

Brittany jumped off the stage and took a seat next to Santana, "It's a good thing he showed up when he did, she was totally two minutes away from ripping my clothes off."

"We all are Britt." Santana replied, Brittany resting her head on the other girl's shoulder.

Rachel made every effort to not put forth any effort in her performance. She half assed the movements, barely sang her part, and leaned away from Puck any time they were close. She kept reminding herself that they were only three days from performing at Nationals, then this whole thing will be over, with Lauren and Puck's relationship still intact because, if Rachel Berry could steal Finn Hudson away from Quinn Fabray, her man stealing powers were limitless and in desperate need of harnessing.

After they'd run through the number twice, Rachel pulled away, "Great practice. I say we're good where we are. We don't need to do it again until Saturday."

"But Rach-"

"I have to go. See you later." She grabbed her bag and practically sprinted for the exit.

"Damn." Santana declared from her seat, "She's got it bad."

"Got what bad?" Puck asked, hopeful that someone saw something in her behavior that proved she felt the same way for him as he did for her.

"She's totally in love with me." Brittany clarified, grabbing Santana's hand and pulling her out of the auditorium talking about how she had to put a nanny cam in her room because she knows her cat sings when she's not in there then totally stops when she walks in.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Have I mentioned yet that I don't own Glee?**_

New Directions had been fundraising since their win at Regional's to pay for their trip to New York. Sure, a few of them could have traveled with their parents and stayed in a sweet New York City hotel, all expenses paid by mommy and daddy…or dad and daddy, but that didn't help morale if the rest of the team was in a roach motel, eating three meals a day off the dollar menu. It was decided that they would all travel together on money they worked for and they would base their hotel and travel choices off that. Between carwashes, bake sales, and Artie's failed attempt at a Strip-O-Gram service, they scrapped together just enough to pay for gas and two rooms (for sixteen people) for two nights in a less than reputable motel in New Jersey. That was until Ms. Pillsbury bought a cupcake, that she refused to touch, at one of the bake sales with all the money she had received in wedding cards to celebrate her short lived marriage. It didn't matter if she was now divorced, a gift was a gift and it was just in bad taste to return it. That was her reasoning anyway. Her contribution allowed them to get two more rooms for the weekend, afford meals, and rent a sixteen passenger van from the seedy used car lot on the outskirts of town.

Rachel had successfully managed to get Puck and Lauren all the way in the back of the van, no one sure of how someone so small could get to be so demanding or why they listened when she started spewing something about why seating arrangements were more conducive to a competitive atmosphere. Before going to his assigned seat, Puck gallantly picked Artie up, stepped up into the van, and helped him sit in the front row next to Mercedes. Rachel couldn't take her eyes away when she saw him effortlessly lift the boy into his arms, saying something about the level of homosexuality that was running rampant in the small van and for Artie to not get any ideas because his heart belonged to another then, right at that moment, he glanced at her. Did Puck really have to keep reminding her of how in love he was with Lauren? Still, she could enjoy the show as his muscles tensed from supporting the weight of their friend and she imagined herself in Artie's place. Rachel didn't realize her eyes were glazed over and her jaw was slightly unhinged until Santana came through and pushed her chin back up then said, "You need to just hit that already Berry."

"Rachel doesn't like violence." Brittany said, following Santana into the van to share the back row with Puck and Lauren. Finn and Quinn filed in with Mike and Tina to the next row while Blaine, Kurt and Sam shared a row and Rachel took her seat in the front with Mercedes and Artie. Once again, she was as far away from him as she could get. She had even tried to claim the passenger seat but Mr. Schuester maintained it was reserved for Ms. Pillsbury.

When she first saw Puck that morning, Rachel noticed he had a black eye and a split lip. She knew it was from one of two reasons. Either he went to that asinine fight club last night or he and Lauren had progressed to a more physical relationship and Lauren likes to get rough. For the first time since she'd found out about it, she found herself wishing it was from the fight club. What Rachel couldn't notice, since she refused to look anywhere near the back of the van, was that while Puck sat next to Lauren, his whole body was tense as he faced straight ahead, but his eyes kept glancing nervously at his now ex-girlfriend.

You heard right, EX-girlfriend. The night before they left, he had finally managed to break up with her and she took it better than he thought she was going to. He simply said things weren't working out and she agreed. He exhaled in relief because he had no idea it was going to be that easy. He could have already been a month in to the four months of ground work he knew he was going to have to put down in order to get anywhere near Rachel Berry's underwear. The break up went so well, he was still going to have time to see Rachel, tell her how he felt, make out until he absolutely HAD to go to his house to get his stuff, come back and pick her up, then spend the day in the back of the van with wondering hands and, _maybe_, her head resting on his shoulder as she slept peacefully. You know, because she'd need a little rest after he'd spent the whole night rocking her world. It was a perfect plan until Lauren told him, despite the fact that the break up was amicable, there were going to be consequences involved and likened it to joining an inner city gang. The only similarity between their relationship and a gang being she was going to have to jump him out. He woke up in the school parking lot, an hour before they were supposed to leave for Nationals, and had just enough time to run home, clean up, grab his stuff, then get back. He couldn't prove it but he was pretty sure Lauren had perfected the art of the beat down to the point that she was able to put a timer on when her victims regained consciousness.

He waited in the parking lot for Rachel but, when she arrived, she was buzzing around, trying to organize everyone and talking about assigned seats. The next thing he knew, he was sitting next to the chick who, twelve hours prior, had thoroughly kicked his ass. Despite the tremendous amount of pain he was in, still uncertain of whether or not a rib had broken loose and was floating around, puncturing something important, he was happier than he'd been in a long time. He woke up that morning smiling wider than he had the night of the Bachelor Auction when he watched as Rachel stood on a chair, enthusiastically screaming her bids, while his mother and Dr. Weinstein's wife had a shouting match in Yiddish. The three women had been advised to attend special counseling sessions with Rabbi Burgman for their outbursts but that just led to his mother and Dr. Weinstein's wife having a fight club of their own in the Rabbi's office. He sat in on the meeting and quickly pulled Rachel out of the way, protectively pinning her to a wall, using his body as a shield, as the two older women started throwing punches, chairs, and insults. Rabbi Burgman suggested individual counseling after that.

But, back to his current problem. He just couldn't seem to get Rachel alone. Anytime they stopped for gas and stretch breaks, she was always the first person out, disappearing and returning at the last minute, just before the van was about to get back on the road. She would have been left at a rest stop in Dubois, Pennsylvania had it not been for the fact that Puck was keeping tabs on her and stopped Mr. Schuester from leaving when Quinn told him everyone was on board. After an entire day of not being able to talk to her he told himself, one way or another, he was not going back to Lima without making out with Rachel Berry, at a minimum of twelve times and getting at least two minutes of under the shirt action.

They arrived at the motel and room arrangements proved to be tricky. Kurt and Blaine couldn't be put together, neither could Santana and Brittany. Santana refused to share a room with Quinn and Quinn told Mr. Schuester that if she was forced to room with Rachel, only one of them would be alive in the morning. Rachel pleaded not to be placed with Lauren, Sam didn't like Finn after he stole Quinn away and Finn was still having issues with Puck after all of the drama that had happened between them. When the hell did Glee Club become more angst ridden than one of those an hour long TV teen dramas?

The result? Will, Finn, Artie, and Kurt in the first room, Puck, Sam, Blaine, and Mike in the second, Emma, Lauren, Brittany, and Quinn in the third and Rachel, Mercedes, Santana, and Tina in the fourth. He was exceptionally proud of himself for finding a way to make things work until Kurt insisted he shouldn't be placed with boys, Finn said it wasn't cool to be in a room with a teacher and his gay brother, Mike was angry with Sam because he thought Tina was going to leave him for the blonde after she gave him her left over fries at lunch (she offered them to Mike first, he declined), and Lauren thought Emma was going to try to psychoanalyze her the whole weekend. Surprisingly, the only room arrangement that didn't have drama was Rachel's. Will realized that, aside from her morning tangent about where everyone needed to sit, she had remained uncharacteristically quiet for the entire trip. In fact, while the group ate dinner at a local diner, Rachel chose to stay in her room and get some rest.

Will still had no idea how two out of their three numbers were going to go on Saturday. He did know the Aerosmith medley he arranged was going to be _Amazing _(pun intended) but, for all he knew, the other two were going to leave the kids _Cryin' _(he was on fire with the puns today). Before they all went to their rooms for the night, he told them The Show Stopper would be their first song, because 1) It was better to open with a slower number and 2) He wanted to grab everyone's attention and show how different their performance was going to be right off the bat. The Rocker would be next and The Shocker would be the closer, since it was always better to finish by giving everyone something to talk about…assuming something to talk about wasn't how a group of teenagers from Limo, Ohio managed to embarrass themselves on front of a room full of their peers.

After laying in bed for an hour, Puck decided that he was finally going to talk to Rachel. He knocked on the door and wasn't surprised to see someone else answer. "What do you want Puckerman?" Santana asked peering out through the opening caused by the chain still being secured from the doorframe to the door. No way to push through. Clever girl.

"Can you get Rachel for me?"

"She's sleeping." She didn't even bother to turn and look into the room to confirm her statement. How does she know his knocking didn't wake her up?

He rolled his eyes, "It's important."

"So is my eight hours of beauty rest and you're dangerously close to cutting into that." She slammed the door in his face causing him to knock again, louder this time, another girl answered, chain still in place.

"Didn't you hear the lady? We're trying to sleep Puck." If the knocking woke Mercedes up, there was no reason to assume it didn't wake the others.

"Mercedes, come on. I just want to talk to Rachel."

"She's sleeping." Again, the door was slammed in his face, leaving him determined to talk to her just out of principle now. He pounded on the door then glanced at the window in time to catch a flash of her face disappear behind the curtains.

Tina opened the door. Damn that chain, "Hey Puck." She said with significantly less attitude than the other girls.

"Tina!" Puck said hopefully, "You know I've always liked you and your freaky vampire clothes and sharpie painted nails." She looked away from him because the other girls told her not to make eye contact once he started being nice, "Who's the one who snuck you the bootlegged Twilight DVD's when your mom refused to let you watch them? Please Tina, and when have you ever known me to beg? Please…get Rachel." There was a split second where he thought he was finally making progress before he heard muffled whispering coming from the other side of the door just before it shut again.

He began pounding, "Open the door Rachel. I know you're awake…I just want to talk." He let his forehead reat on the door. When there was a short stretch of silence, he decided he wasn't above making assumptions. There was no way he was the only one who felt there was something between them, "I broke up with Lauren." He held his breath.

"PUCK!" Mr. Schuester came out of his room in a pair of boxers and a t-shirt, startling Puck, just as Rachel swung her door open, a hopeful yet disappointed look in her eyes. Was it possible for those two emotions to combine on the same face? It was like watching cold and warm air collide to form a tornado. Yeah, he paid attention in Earth Science. What of it? He thought, if he got better grades, Rachel would reward him with something horizontal…or vertical if she wanted to use the wall, "Get to your room right now!"

"Two minutes Mr. Schue." He asked, never looking away from the girl in front of him but noticed, out of the corner of his eye, three other faces peaking out from behind the curtains of her room.

"Then I'll stand right here until you're done." Will crossed his arms and waited. Puck growled in frustration, wondering when the whole world had turned against him. He wanted to talk to Rachel but not so badly that he was willing to share the moment with a guy who used enough hair product to make the club nervous when he stood by an open flame and was wearing boxer shorts with the Journey '_Greatest Hits_' album cover across the ass. He growled one last time then walked back to his room, glaring at Will on the way.

"Get to bed Rachel." The teacher called down to the girl, who was still standing in her doorway, an odd expression on her face. He broke up with Lauren…her plan failed. Rachel Berry was, once again, a home wrecker.

The next morning came and Puck planned on pulling Rachel aside before they left for the competition but, once again, the universe proved it hated him. Lauren was missing. Well, missing wasn't the best word to describe what she was since she left a note and they knew exactly where she went. Apparently, Lane Bryant was having an open call for a new model and she decided that was more important than performing with New Directions.

"Kurt and I were afraid this was going to happen." Blaine admitted, sitting at the breakfast table. While Rachel didn't sit next to Puck, she did sit across from him and one chair over. He wasn't sure if it was her or Mike but he could just barely feel another foot touching his through his shoe. Progress.

"The course of this Glee Club never did run smoothly." Kurt added, "Especially on competition days. It's lucky for you all that Blaine and I were prepared in the event of a deserter. Two, in fact, just to be safe."

"But we can't afford to even lose one. We need twelve to compete." Rachel reminded them.

"And now, you have thirteen." Kurt admitted. The group looked around confused so he rolled his eyes, "Oh, honestly people. Is it really that difficult to figure out? Blaine and I transferred to McKinley on Thursday afternoon."

Wide eyes, relief, and shouts of excitement came from everyone at the table. Will acted quickly, "Ok. We'll spend the morning getting them ready." Once again, Puck's plans went out the window. Maybe he should go back to cleaning pools and chasing cougars. Then he looked up and saw Rachel smiling at him from her seat and decided any chance of chasing anyone but Rachel Berry, for his foreseeable future, was completely out of the question. Will continued, "Kurt, you'll join Tina and Quinn. Blaine, you're with Santana and Mercedes."

"Try to keep up pretty boy." Santana called from her end of the table.

"Keep up with what? Are we having a race today too? Because I didn't bring any sneakers with me." Brittany stated, worried she didn't come fully prepared for competition.

As soon as they arrived at the theater, Emma disappeared mumbling something about preparations for The Shocker. The team took their seats and Rachel didn't sit very far from Puck at all. The only person separating them was Sam. He might have to re-evaluate the hands down her pants in four months plan. Things were progressing so quickly that he might be getting in there in three and a half months. Score.

He reached his arms up in a blatantly fake yawn and stretched his right arm over the back of Sam's chair, just barely able to reach the middle of Rachel's. Sam nervously looked back at his arm then to Puck, "Seriously?"

"Football injury. I have to stretch or my shoulder cramps up." Puck explained as Rachel leaned toward Sam so Puck could reach the back of her head. Three months…tops.

Again, an uncomfortable Sam took in the fact that Rachel was sitting so close to him, "Comfortable?" He asked.

"Yes. Very." She replied simply, allowing Puck to gently play with her hair. She had spent most of the night staring at the ceiling, thinking about her situation before deciding that, OK, maybe she was a home wrecker but, if she was going to Jew Hell over it, her place there was going to be well deserved. Besides, based off his version of extra curricular activities, Puck was more than likely going there as well and she'd be in good company. If he would be doing whatever it is he's doing now that's causing her to simultaneously have goose bumps, butterflies, and blurred vision, it would be worth it.

"Hello competitors and guests and welcome to the 2011 National Show Choir Competition. Please give a warm welcome to our judges, Grammy Award winning recording artist and actress, Eve." The woman stood and waved to the crowd as they cheered then sat back down, "Star of _Full House_, _ER_, and the Broadway revival of _Bye Bye Birdie_, John Stamos."

"He kind of looks like my dentist." Brittany observed.

Sam sat tense and extremely uncomfortable between Rachel and Puck and kept glancing back and forth between the two of them. It wasn't until he heard a moan coming from Rachel that he leaned forward to, at least, partially remove himself from the situation. He didn't want people thinking they were all in love with each other and Puck and Rachel shared him. He had an aunt who married a Mormon and knew how these things worked. Sam had to admit, he could think of worse people to be in a polygamous relationship with and, mental self high five to him for knowing the word polygamous. Puck was a pretty good looking guy and could offer a certain level of protection while Rachel was super smart and driven like no one he had ever met before. With Sam's charm and Justin Bieber hair, their possibilities as a polygamous power couple were unstoppable. As soon as he leaned forward, Puck grabbed his shoulder with the hand that wasn't touching Rachel and pulled him back with a threatening glare and a shake of his head. Apparently, Sam was serving as some sort of shield, protecting the duo from prying eyes. Didn't he know the people behind them could see everything he was doing? Oh, right...they were in the back row...great.

"Star of stage and screen, known best for her role as Glinda in the musical _Wicked_, Kristin Chenoweth." The small woman stood and waved enthusiastically at the crowd.

"Broadway and television sensation, Matthew Morrison."

The girls in the audience began screaming as he stood and waved, and Tina leaned into Mercedes, "He's so hot. Could you imagine having him as a Glee Club teacher?"

"I know girl. I'd run scales with him all day long."

Puck smirked when he heard Rachel say, as he had moved on to massaging the back of her neck, "I don't know what the big deal is. He's not really that cute. Too much hair for my taste."

"And finally, a world famous martial artist, actor, and honorary Texas Ranger, let's give a warm welcome to Chuck Norris." He stood, gave a winning smile, and a double thumbs up as the audience looked around at each other and clapped but remained unsure of what Chuck Norris was doing judging a singing competition.

Will had been staring at the judges table trying to figure out why Emma was sitting right behind all of them and, was she talking to herself?


	5. Chapter 5

_**Not sure about this one. It was very difficult to describe what I was going for. Don't own any of the songs mentioned…Also, I've forgotten to thank everyone for the reviews. They are always greatly appreciated and it's a good feeling to know you're all enjoying the story. IsisLes5, you speak waaaay more English than I do Spanish so, snaps to you on that!**_

At intermission, the group left their seats to begin getting ready for their performance. Puck had decided, despite his progress with Rachel during the first half of the competition, he didn't want to have the feelings talk until he could fully unload, without interruptions and without spectators. It would happen that night, at the motel, after he told Sam, Mike, and Blaine to go find something else to do until the van left in the morning because their room was going to be booked up. He settled on simply walking beside her, shoulders lightly touching as they followed behind the group on their way to the dressing rooms, all of a sudden too excited and shy to say a word or make eye contact with one another. When the time came to separate into the boys and girls rooms, he offered her a smile, brushed his thumb against her cheek, and walked backward into his changing room, not taking his eyes off her until he was through the door and it shut. What was this chick doing to him? Once he was in the dressing room he committed his brain to thinking of a naked Rachel Berry snuggled up...Wait! No! Damn it! He couldn't even get his fantasies to work right anymore.

Rachel calmed the butterflies in her stomach, took a deep breath, and walked into the hail storm that was the girls dressing room. Her teammates were mixed in with the girls from several other schools, all running around, screaming about hair, make-up, and wardrobes. She wove through the madness, careful not to step on any toes or bump into the competition causing a backstage catfight to erupt, something she had been all too familiar with since she was four and she caught Melissa Harrison next to her evening gown with a pair of scissors at the Little Miss Lima Pageant. It was her first backstage brawl but she knew, even then, it wouldn't be her last. Everyone knew Rachel Berry detested violence, and she did, apparently with the exception being when Puck was the one throwing punches…still hot…and what was the world coming to that he was thinking about being snuggle bunnies while she was becoming increasingly fixated on all the sweaty things that happen just before the snuggling. Anyway...what people didn't know about Rachel Berry was that, when the time came to throw down behind the scenes, she was all knees, elbows, and attitude.

The girls managed to make it through their preparations unscathed, two scuffles almost forming. The first when a girl from Minnesota made a backhanded compliment to Quinn about the New Directions' wardrobe choice. The second when several opponents from a performing arts high school in Maryland made continuous snide comments about the two lesbians from Ohio. This conversation was overheard by Rachel and her teammates were surprised with the reaction it provoked as they dragged their small friend out of the room while she screamed something about The Berry Crusher and how Santana and Brittany had more talent in their perfectly manicured pinky fingers than they had in their, "Whole punk ass performing arts school filled with over privileged, raggedy ass bitch posers who's daddies paid for the small amount of talent they do have." No one believed Mercedes later when she told them Rachel actually grabbed her crotch and spit into the room just before the door shut behind them and they entered the hallway. The boys stood wide eyed at the scene and Puck had never been more turned on in his entire life.

Santana's reaction was the most surprising. She put her hands on the small girl's shoulders, causing Rachel to look at her, laughed, then pulled her in for a hug that Brittany joined in on, followed shortly by the rest of the club because, really? When did Rachel Berry surpass Santana Lopez as the reigning New Directions crazy queen bee irrational bitch? Easy, when she started hanging out with Noah Puckerman and, without realizing it, became the badass queen to his king.

When Will left his seat, it was to go in search of Emma. He finally found her, at the concession stand, in line directly behind Eve and Kristin Chenoweth. She was staring intently at the two women and moving her mouth with no one there to listen. He walked up to her and asked what she was doing.

"Oh, you know. I just have one of those songs stuck in my head. It's driving me crazy." He nodded in understanding.

"We're the fourth group after intermission. We follow Vocal Adrenaline so we'll be right back stage, watching their show." He looked at Emma and noticed she wasn't listening to him, still softly singing to herself, "Emma."

"What? Sorry Will. You were saying?"

"I'm just worried the kids will feel intimidated having to follow Vocal Adrenaline. Who knows what they have planned?"

She simply looked at him, "Do you have faith in your kids Will?"

"Of course I do."

"Then you don't need to worry about what Vocal Adrenaline does."

He smiled at her, "I guess you're right. I think I'm more worried about the unknown. Speaking of, did you get your last minute preparations done for The Shocker?"

"Not yet." She seemed like she was trying to get rid of him, "Shouldn't you be with the kids? Getting them pumped up or whatever it is you guys do before a show?"

He looked at his watch, "You're right. I'll see you backstage when we go on?" He asked but she was back to singing to herself, "Emma?"

"Huh? Oh, yes. Backstage for the show. I will be there."

He looked at her and replied hesitantly, "Great. See you then."

She took a quick break from singing to herself, "Uh-huh." Then started right back up again.

Puck didn't get a moment with Rachel after her outburst because Santana and Brittany hadn't let the girl out of their sight. They spent the rest of the time they had, before they went on, reliving the moment, making jokes and imitating Rachel's crazy eyes to Mr. Schuester who laughed along with them. He looked briefly out at the judges to see that, once again, Emma was sitting behind them, talking to herself. He turned his attention back to the kids who were still laughing and was proud of their new found solidarity. Who knew Rachel Berry and one of her outbursts would be the catalyst for said solidarity? They were so wrapped up in their fun that they didn't even pay attention to anything Vocal Adrenaline had done. Will, however, did and was only slightly worried at their futuristic performance featuring robotic movements in their choreography, dancing laser beams, metallic wardrobes and songs that started with Styx, "_Mr. Roboto_", followed by Katy Perry's "_E.T_.", then ended with Nicki Minaj and Will.'s "_Check it Out_". Sunshine Corazon played her part well, serving as the featured singer for each number.

The curtain dropped and the host walked back on stage, "How about that Vocal Adrenaline? Every year they dazzle us." The crowd continued to cheer.

Rachel finally made her way to Puck and stood beside him, as the Vocal Adrenaline kids left the stage saying things like, "What's up losers…Good luck following that…The applause you'll be hearing at the end of your performance will still be from our standing ovation." Luckily, crazy Rachel the "Berry Crusher" was gone and focused Rachel was in her place. She ignored the taunts and allowed Santana to handle things, hearing various responses from the Latina that involved doing things to their mothers, bitches getting stitches, and something about an uncle she works for, who's always willing to give her an alibi, because he owes her for taking the rap on an assault charge that would have been his third strike.

Rachel squeezed Puck's hand, and smiled up at him before she walked out with Mike to take their positions. They all were all barefoot, in jeans, and white wife beaters. Emma took her place beside Will.

"Where've you been?"

"Working on The Shocker."

"And it's ready?"

"If it's not now, it's not going to be." She replied trying to give him a comforting smile but only looking just as nervous as he felt.

When the crowd finally died down from the excitement of Vocal Adrenaline, the announcer continued, "Ladies and Gentlemen, from Lima, Ohio, New Directions." He stepped backstage and the curtain was raised as a large spotlight focused on Rachel, the rest of the lights out, as an acoustic guitar began playing and she tapped her foot in time to the opening of Jason Mraz's "_If It Kills Me_". Not the version from the regular album, the one from the Casa Nova Sessions. The one that makes a girl like Rachel Berry fall in love with a guy like Noah Puckerman when sung just right and goes down so much smoother.

She began a slow contemporary dance, by herself, utilizing the years of classes her fathers paid for, "_Hello,_" Puck stepped into outer edge of the light but she pretended not to see him. He stared longingly at her, "_Tell me you know, yeah, you've figured me out. Something gave it away. And it would be such a beautiful moment to see the look on your face. To know that I know that you know now._" He reached out for her but she danced away to reveal that there were two spotlights. One followed her and the second stayed on Puck as he watched her, "_And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking. You know nothing._" While singing the next line he jogged up to her, tapped her on the shoulder then ducked down behind her, "_'Cause you and I, why we go carrying on for hours on end._" She laughed as he grabbed her, dipped her playfully, then returned to seriousness, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, "_We get along much better than you and your boyfriend._" As soon as the word 'boyfriend' was sung, Mike appeared behind Rachel and Puck's expression darkened. He picked her up bridal style and spun away gracefully as the rest of the lights on stage were turned on, set to be much dimmer than usual. A broken hearted Puck watched them dance together as he sang, with Mike lifting and spinning Rachel elegantly, "_Well, all I really want to do is love you. A kind much closer than friends use. But I still can't say it after all we've been through._ _And all I really want from you is to feel me. As the feeling inside keeps building. And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me._" He put his head down and his hands in his pockets.

With Mike's arms wrapped around her, swaying the two of them slowly, she looked up at him and smiled, "_Well, how long can I go on like this,_" Her smile dropped and she looked over her shoulder to Puck, "…_wishing to kiss you. Before I rightly explode._" She turned back to Mike, resting her hand on his cheek as he leaned into her touch, "_And this double life I lead isn't healthy for me, in fact it makes me nervous._" She turned in his arms to face Puck, "_If I get caught I could be risking it all._" She gently pushed away from Mike as he disappeared back stage and she tentatively stepped toward Puck. He looked up at her hopefully, "_Well, baby there's a lot that I miss in case I'm wrong._" She continued to step forward slowly, "_All I really want to do is love you. A kind much closer than friends use. But I still can't say it after all we've been through._" She reached him and Puck held her hands in his, "_And all I really want from you is to feel me." _He pulled her arms around his waist as she continued, looking up at him lovingly, "_As the feeling inside keeps building. And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me._"

The others watched from the sidelines, waiting for their cue. This was the first time any of them had seen the number done full force and it was having a different effect on them all. Some of the girls, and Sam, had tears forming in their eyes and Finn felt a pang of jealousy hit as his, "Rachel Might Be Over Me" alarm started going off in his head. He found himself wondering if he should break up with Quinn and get back together with her.

Brittany turned to Santana, "It was so much hotter when I did it with her."

The girl wrapped her arm around the blonde's shoulders, "Most def, babe."

Rachel pulled Puck's hands up to her chest, resting over her heart and sang to him, "_If I should be so bold, I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hand._" He tried to fight the excitement he felt at the fact that his hands were touching her boob.

He moved his hands up, free of hers, and placed them on either side of her face, pressing his forehead to hers as he sang and they both closed their eyes, "_Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man._" Again, Mike came up behind her, wrapped his arms around her from behind, lifting her slightly and spinning away from Puck as she kept turning her head against the spin to keep her eyes on him while they both sang, "_But I never said a word I guess I'm gonna miss my chance again._"

The rest of the team came out on stage, also dressed in white wife beaters, jeans, and no shoes, dancing around Puck in a chaotic motion, cutting him off from getting to Rachel as the pair sang together, "_Well, all I really want to do is love you. A kind much closer than friends use._" He continued to fight against the current of people, "_But I still can't say it after all we've been through. And all I really want from you is to feel me._" Rachel kept her eyes on Puck as she danced with Mike, constantly trying to get away but being pulled back into him, "_As the feeling inside keeps building. And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me, if it kills me. I think it might kill me._"

Finally, she pushed Mike away and he, again, disappeared backstage as Puck broke through the line of people who were holding him back and they went back stage as well. The pair looked at each other, still singing together, "_And all I really want from you is to feel me._" They took slow steps toward one another, "_It's a feeling inside that keeps building. And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me._" They reached each other, the stage lights dimming back out and the spotlight on them. Puck tangled his hand in Rachel's hair, bringing his lips within centimeters of hers, foreheads touching as his other hand rested on her hip, pulling her bottom half flush against his. In return, she clung to the hem of his shirt for dear life on either side at his waist, staring at his lips with barely open eyes, hoping he'd use them to bridge the gap between them. It wasn't written in the script but, hey, a girl could hope.

He sang the last line by himself into her lips, "_It might kill me"_

Even Will was affected by the performance as he spoke to Emma, not looking away from the stage, "After you got married, I listened to this song everyday." She stared at him, surprised by his honesty and what the lyrics said, tears beginning to form in her eyes at his confession.

The crowd cheered and, before Puck and Rachel could continue what should have been a private moment, the familiar sound of the guitar for _'Walk This Way'_ filled the theater and the stage lights came back up to their regular brightness, different colored lights flashing to the beat. She heard Puck whisper one word as he nuzzled her nose with his, before they had to separate to opposite ends of the stage and the others came out. The word made Rachel's stomach tie up in knots, her heart flutter, and brought a grin wider than anything Finn ever put there. The word was, "Later." With that word, he was certain, to hell with three months, Rachel Berry was more than willing to do him senseless right then and there because she responded with a faint whimper as they pulled away from one another.

In the short time between leaving the stage and the end of Puck and Rachel's song, the rest of the group performed a quick, but simple, wardrobe change assisted by several of the team's mothers. They stripped off their white wife beaters and put on black ones then accessorized with various pieces of 'Rocker Gear' which included studded belts or skull and cross bone belt buckles, cuff bracelets. hats, some wore black bandanas tied around their wrists, they cut holes in their pants, slipped on their typical black Chuck Taylors, and even managed to find time for the boys, who weren't wearing hats, to mess up their hair and the girls to spray different colors into theirs.

Mercedes, Blaine and Santana stepped out, with equal measures of diva ferocity and began to sing as the rest of the group followed on stage for the chorus. Rachel and Puck did their change just as quickly on opposite sides of the stage and smiled at each other as they walked out at the same time to join the group.

Kurt gave his father the signal they agreed on, an inconspicuous tug on the ear which resulted in Mr. Hummel standing and pumping his fist in the air because, as everyone knows, a strategically placed fist pump can be contagious. Seconds later, the entire crowd was on their feet, punching the air to the beat of the '_Dude Looks Like A Lady_' then '_Love in an Elevator'. _Judges always notice crowd involvement.

When the number ended, the crowd went wild and the kids walked to the edge of the stage, arms around each other or holding hands, all joined together, to face the judges. This was the moment they would find out if The Shocker was going to work or if they were going to fail miserably.

Rachel felt Puck's entire front pressing into her back and tried to remember how to breath before she spoke for the group, "Our final song will be judges choice."

Will looked at Emma, panicked as she explained, "Have you ever had a song stuck in your head Will? Had no idea where you heard it but it drove you crazy all day and you just weren't happy until you actually heard the song in it's entirety?"

"Emma, what did you do?" Will Schuester was freaking out.

She sang silently to him, "_We didn't start the fire. It was always burning since the world's been turning_."

He narrowed his eyes at her in confusion before they watched the judges consult one another before Kristin asked, "You mean, you're going to give us a list of songs and we pick one for you to sing?"

"No." Rachel corrected, "You pick any song you want to hear and we'll sing it."

"Because that's just how badass we are." Puck added, "You understand, right Chuck?" He fired a finger gun and winked at the man.

Chuck Norris knew where he was coming from and nodded with a smile.

They huddled together again and Kristin whispered, "I don't know about you guys but I've had a song stuck in my head all day."

"I know! Me too." Matthew agreed.

"_We Didn't Start The Fire_?" Eve asked and they all nodded.

"It must have been playing in the limo on the way over this morning." Chuck explained.

"That's a tough one though, there's no way these kids are going to be able to pull that off." John argued.

"They said any song Stamos." Eve countered and they all shared a brief moment of silence before their agreement. She looked up to the group, "Alright badasses, Billy Joel, '_We Didn't Start The Fire'_." Because, Eve was the Ruff Ryders First Lady and, where she came from, if you make a claim about how hard you are, you bes' be ready to back it up.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Not my song or Chuck Norris facts…Still don't own Glee but thinking of writing a letter to correct that. Everyone seemed to enjoy Polygamous Sam so I added more, hope I didn't go too overboard with it. **_

The kids concealed their excitement, that the plan had actually worked, and took a moment to huddle together to discuss things. Will's jaw was on the floor and his eyes were huge, "How did you do that?"

"Chuck Norris' tears might be able to cure…" She hesitated, trying to remember then waved dismissively as if it wasn't important, "…whatever. But he and the other judges are not impervious to the Earworm." Will looked confused, "It's what you call a song that you hear and gets stuck in your head. I did a paper on it my junior year of college."

"So, this whole time you were-"

"Planting the worm."

"Isn't that cheating?"

"Depends on who you ask."

Will stared at her for a second before breaking into a huge grin, wrapping his arms around her, lifting her up and spinning, "You're amazing."

"So, you're not mad?"

"Are you kidding me? Those kids have been screwed over more times than I can count. They deserve to win this."

In the onstage huddle, the club was also wide eyed, "I can't believe it worked." Kurt stated.

Santana added, "Forget everything bad I ever said about Ms. Pillsbury. She's a friggin' genius!"

"We're totally going to win this guys." Artie added.

"What do you think Rach?" Puck was the only one who noticed she wasn't as excited as everyone else and had a troubled expression on her face.

"I want to win…but not this way."

"I agree." She smiled at Puck, relieved someone else was on her side. Of course, she was positive there had been a shift in their relationship and his agreement could just be Puck trying to get laid, but she'd take all the help she could get.

"But, in practice, you said-" Mercedes started but was cut off.

"That's because I didn't think this was going to have any chance at working." Half the club agreed with her while the other half clenched their jaws in frustration.

"Fine. Go be moral or whatever." Santana rolled her eyes trying to maintain her bad girl image but secretly being one of the few who agreed with Rachel. She knew they were the best here and they didn't need to cheat to prove it.

Rachel addressed the judges, "Unfortunately, that number is already in our repertoire. It would be unfair of us to perform it. Perhaps you'd like to make another selection."

Chuck Norris smiled at their honesty and gave them a thumbs up before calling the other judges together to make another song selection. Of course he was impervious to the Earworm, he was Chuck Norris, not Steven Seagal. He just didn't say anything to the other judges because he wanted to see if the group would actually go through with it. Honesty goes a long way with getting on Chuck Norris' good side.

Will's good mood disappeared at Rachel's statement, "What are they doing? Is this part of the plan?" Emma was just as surprised and shook her head.

Now, for all the fun facts people like to make up about Chuck Norris, OK, maybe some of them are true, the one they overlooked was that he loved him some Huey Lewis and The Mother-Bumpin' News. So when the other judges circled around and he told them his choice, John tried to argue with him, stating they should all agree on a song. Chuck simply laughed at the silly gesture of arguing with Chuck Norris then turned to the group on stage, "Huey Lewis and The News, '_I Want a New Drug'_."

The group quickly huddled back down, "What the hell is that?" Santana asked confused.

"The duck brothers." Brittany told everyone like it was the most obvious thing in the world, "You know, _DuckTales_. He totally messed up Louie's name though and forgot all about Dewey." She explained further.

"Guys, my dad is a Huey Lewis and the News freak." Mike admitted.

"So is mine." Rachel added.

Everyone looked to her and Mike put his hand on her shoulder, "Then it's all you Rach." She glanced at the others as they smiled and nodded their heads in agreement then looked to Puck. He gave her a knowing smirk and she smiled back, the two having a conversation in three seconds of eye contact, "No. I already had my moment Mike. This one's yours."

The jaws of everyone else dropped for the fact that Rachel Berry was actually being selfless. They turned for guidance to an even more shocked Mike Chang. He swallowed his nerves, "OK." He and Rachel quickly explained everyone's parts, told them what the chorus was, as Rachel added what key it was in, and to follow her and Mike for the changes, "Artie, give me a beat?"

"Done."

"Rach, back me up?"

"My pleasure." She smiled at him. He stepped forward to the front of the group still in disbelief. Mike Chang was going to save the day.

Will saw what was going on and held his breath until he heard Artie spit out a beat box rhythm then Rachel began to sing the melody, Santana and Mercedes joined in…next came Puck, Finn and Sam, everyone else following closely behind…and Mike began singing the lyrics as he danced around the stage in typical Mike Chang fashion. This was going to work!

"_I want a new drug. One that won't make me sick. One that won't make me crash my car Or make me feel three feet thick. I want a new drug. One that won't hurt my head. One that won't make my mouth too dry. Or make my eyes too red._"

Half the group joined him for the chorus, the other half continued to substitute the instruments with their voices, "_One that won't make me nervous. Wonderin' what to do. One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you._"

He signaled to Rachel and she sang out, turning to Puck, smiling, "_When I'm alone with you._" Puck made a mental note to himself to get alone with her as soon as humanly possible.

Mike took over again, as everyone ad libbed dance moves with each other, smiling and truly having fun, moving all over the stage to encourage crowd participation. The audience was on their feet, clapping and dancing along, "_I want a new drug. One that won't spill. One that don't cost too much. Or come in a pill. I want a new drug. One that won't go away. One that won't keep me up all night. One that won't make me sleep all day._"

They repeated the chorus, "_One that won't make me nervous. Wonderin' what to do. One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you._"

Again, Rachel belted the last portion of it, "_When I'm alone with you…_" She pointed to Puck then flipped her hand over to beckon him to her with her pointer finger, "_I'm alone with you, baby._" They stood closely, face to face, legs straddling each other's, rocking to the beat.

Mike pulled Tina in to dance with him as he continued, "_I want a new drug. One that does what it should. One that won't make me feel too bad. One that won't make me feel too good. I want a new drug. One with no doubt. One that won't make me talk too much. Or make my face break out._"

They sang the chorus once more, "_One that won't make me nervous. Wonderin' what to do. One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you." _

Rachel finished with the last lines, "_When I'm alone with you. All alone with you, yea, yea._" She wrapped her arms around Puck just the same as the other couples on the stage and, after a few more seconds of voicing instrumentals, they ended the song. The crowd erupted in applause.

The curtain dropped and they ran off stage to Mr. Schuester who was barely containing his excitement, "Where…did that come from?" They all shared hugs of relief and excitement.

"Sorry we didn't stick to the plan Ms. Pillsbury." Brittany spoke to the Guidance Counselor.

"Even if you hadn't just blown that out of the water, I wouldn't be any less proud of you for not going with the plan. That took guts. It was amazing." The kids all smiled at each other.

"Ok. Wow. We need to get back to our seats. There's only a few more groups until the break for judging. No one goes to the changing rooms. I don't want a repeat of what happened earlier."

Rachel looked down shyly as Santana screamed menacingly, "The Berry Crusher!" and everyone laughed.

Once again, Puck walked alongside Rachel. When they reached the back of the theater to take their seats, Sam looked between the duo before huffing loudly and stepping toward the seat between them. Puck quickly grabbed his shirt and pulled him back, switching seats with the boy. He didn't know whether to be relieved or hurt by the fact that he had been kicked out of the couple before turning his attention to Tina and Mike, who were on his other side. Mike was a great dancer and the hero for the day. Tina was so sweet and also a good dancer. Chang squared plus Evans, no, too wordy…Chang Chevens, not bad…Ch-Cham! There it is!

Puck wrapped his arm around the back of Rachel's chair and she leaned in to him glad all the avoiding and awkwardness was over. They watched the final groups perform, knowing none of them came close to what they just did, and he thought about talking to her while the judges were locked up in their secret room, choosing a winner. That way, they didn't have to talk at all at the motel and could move straight to more important matters centered around the bedular region of the room. When it came to Rachel Berry and the rounding of bases, Puck was all about cutting corners. That plan joined all his others when Mercedes and Kurt pulled her away during the break to go to the lobby and scope out man candy for Mercedes because, "Everyone in this damn club is paired off and I'll be damned if I join some kind of sad love triangle with Artie and Sam." Mersamarties…almost like mercenaries, but cooler if Artie straps on his Robocop legs…but, still, not as good as Ch-Cham!

"Don't go looking for any man candy of your own Berry." Puck smiled as she stood, meeting his smile with a flirtatious one of her own.

"When I want man candy, I already know where to find it Puckerman." And Evans. Sam was sure she still wanted him with them…Sackleberry!

"It's Noah to you." She smiled over her shoulder at him while walking away with her friends. He could see the gossip gears grinding in Mercedes and Kurt's heads as they also looked back at him.

Sam got excited as Tina and Mike brought him into their conversation. Oh! What if the groups fought over him? Why not? He's a good looking guy who has a lot to offer, well, obviously not to Quinn because she's a stone cold cheating bitch. Besides, the merging of Finn and Quinn's names just leaves Finn or Quinn. Where's the fun in that? They could keep each other and their blandness and stay the hell away from him. Sam got busy making mental lists of the pro's and con's for each power couple he could be a part of then realized he was excluding one very important option, Santana and Brittany. Now we're talkin'!

In the judges room Chuck sat quietly, keeping to himself, while the others debated who the winner would be.

"I'm going to be honest, I was not a fan of New Directions." Matt admitted.

"I thought they were wonderful." Kristin looked off smiling, remembering the emotions the first number evoked and sighed.

"They did rise to the challenge." Eve agreed.

"Whatever, can we hurry this along? I have a double date with the Olson twins." John declared from his seat, staring at his phone.

Eve and Kristin looked at him with disgust and Eve spoke up, "Aren't you a little old to be dating an Olson twin?"

"I never said AN Olson twin…I said THE Olson twins." Again, the women were grossed out and John looked like there was nothing wrong with it, "What? They're legal."

Chuck stood, "Ok. I've made my decision."

"Excuse me?" Matt said, "You can't just decide, on your own, who wins."

"Of course I can." He smiled and smacked the man's shoulder in a friendly gesture, causing Matt to contort his face in pain, "I'm Chuck Norris." And, with that, he walked out of the room followed by Eve and Kristin who already knew his choice and agreed.

When everyone returned to their seats, Rachel sat between Sam and Puck because, he maintained, "Dude keeps staring at me with a goofy grin and batting his eyes at me." Rachel rested her head on Puck's shoulder as Sam had one arm spread over the back of her chair and the other over the back of Tina's…Cha-Cha Sackleberry.

"The judges have chosen the top three groups, in no particular order. Please come on stage when your name is called…Vocal Adrenaline." The crowd cheered, as the group smiled smugly, no excitement, as if they already knew they had won and everything else was just a technicality, "Burning Down Broadway" Rachel scoffed and rolled her eyes as the members from the performing arts high school in Maryland rushed on stage excitedly.

Puck noticed her fists clench, "Easy killer." He soothed.

"And finally…" The announcer waited, building the anticipation, "…New Directions." It took a second for the group to realize their name had been called, as the crowd cheered and looked back and them, some telling them to get up on stage because none of them were moving. They finally made it up, breathing heavy from excitement and, again, joined by hands, linked arms, and arms over shoulders. Once more, the announcer waited, allowing the teens to feel what it was like to have a heart attack, "Third place goes to-"

"Wait!" Everyone turned to the back of the theater to see none other than Jesse St. James making his way down one of the aisles, "I have proof this competition was rigged so Vocal Adrenaline would win."

Low murmurs and gasps of shock filled the crowd. Once it died down, "That's all well and good, son." Chuck Norris stood from his chair, "But they didn't win."

The shoulders of every member in Vocal Adrenaline slumped in disappointment. They didn't win. But…they always win. What was different this year? What happened? Chuck Norris, that's what happened. He wasn't even supposed to be here today. The fifth judge was meant to be Gwyneth Paltrow but she cancelled and, since they share the same agent, and Chuck was in town so his beard could attend a World Peace Summit, he agreed to fill in.

Jesse explained anyway, and Puck watched Rachel for any sign of residual feelings for the boy. After everything that had happened to get them to this point, he'd be damned if he'd let this assbag come in and ruin everything. His worries were eased when Rachel leaned back into him, resting the back of her head on his chest, then grabbed his hand and pulled his arm up to wrap around her waist. He smirked at Jesse who had taken the time to look right at her. Suck it, punk!

Apparently, Vocal Adrenaline operates off an alumni favor system which works as follows: Each new member of V.A. has to commit a felony of some sort, only a few going so far as to commit murder, as an initiation to get into the group. The police 'conveniently' catch them in the act, take them to the station, and the V.A. coach shows up to bail them out, promising to not tell their parents or anyone else. The catch? "Someday, and that day may never come, I may call upon you to do a service for me."

"The Godfather…awesome." Sam smiled.

What does any of this have to do with Gwyneth Paltrow? During her teen years, she toured the country, transferring from school to school to perform with various successful show choirs in order to gain stage experience. She was a member of the elite group for a few months in 1987. Over twenty years later, Gwyneth was called and told to serve as a judge in a high school show choir competition. She would seduce Matthew Morrison and John Stamos in order to get the majority vote and that vote was to go to Vocal Adrenaline. At the last minute, her morals got the better of her and she decided to come clean to her publicist, who advised her to lay low until the record of her grand theft charge, with a young Winona Ryder (Also of Vocal Adrenaline), blew over. In the meantime, she called fellow V.A. alumni, and family friend, Jesse St. James to blow the lid off the whole operation.

The judges thanked Jesse for his information and assured him the Show Choir Ethics Committee would be looking into his claims. They then signaled for the announcer to reveal the results, "I guess I'll have to do this differently, to put the suspense back in the moment. We'll start with second place, since we already know they didn't win…Vocal Adrenaline." The group unenthusiastically walked off the stage, leaving the second place trophy and the judges hanging on the congratulatory hand shake portion of the award ceremony, "Third place goes to…" The two remaining teams held their breath...


	7. Chapter 7

_**Not funny enough to come up with my own Chuck Norris Facts so I had to borrow a few. Apparently, the last chapter wasn't up to par so, hope this one doesn't disappoint. If it does, eh…I enjoyed writing it anyway. **_

Both remaining teams held their breath, waiting for the announcer to reveal which of them came in third, "…Burning Down Broadway." In that moment, New Directions went wild, jumping up and down, screaming, and hugging each other like they were professional huggers, at a hugging convention.

Once Burning Down Broadway left the stage, Rachel glaring at several members as they passed, the team stepped forward and claimed their trophy. It was, rightfully, placed in Mike's hands and he passed it to Will who held it above his head triumphantly, with tears in his eyes. The team shook the judges hands and posed for pictures.

As the crowd cleared, thegroup and their families mingled with the judges on stage for a few moments and Puck immediately placed himself next to Chuck Norris, "You died ten years ago but death is too chicken shit to tell you?"

"Not true…as far as I know."

"No signs of life on Mars because you've already been there?"

He laughed, "Not true. But I have been to Death Valley."

"So badass." Puck said, more to himself than Chuck.

Tina, Mercedes, a few of the mothers, and Rachel's Dad surrounded Matthew Morrison, staring at him adoringly and asking to touch his hair. It would have been creepy if it didn't happen all the time.

John Stamos was speaking to Brittany, "So, how old did you say you were again?"

Santana came up and put her arm around her shoulders, glaring at the man, "She's taken Uncle Jesse. Move on." She waved him away.

Rachel was going join Puck with Chuck Norris but was unexpectedly pulled in a different direction. She turned to see Jesse smiling down at her, "Congratulations!" He wrapped her up in an uncomfortable hug.

"Thank you Jesse." She broke free then turned back to look at Puck and smiled as he was now learning how to roundhouse kick from Chuck. She saw a hand waving in front of her face and remembered she wasn't by herself.

"Did you hear anything I just said?"

She shook herself free from her Puck haze, "No, I'm sorry. What?"

"I did it all for you. I made a mistake last year Rachel. You're all I've been able to think about since we crushed your team at Regional's. And this was my way to prove to you that I could change…be a better boyfriend. Of course, I'll probably have to serve a few years, once news of my initiation induced drug dealing comes out, but you can wait for me." He tried to graze his fingers along her cheek but she leaned away from him, like Neo dodging bullets in the Matrix.

"That's very flattering Jesse but, I'm not interested. Excuse me." His face fell as she walked away. And, that quickly, that easily, Jesse St. James was out of her life, only to be remembered vaguely as the second boy who broke her heart. She headed for Puck, who was now talking to Mike, showing him the roundhouse kick, then making fun of him because he was Asian and couldn't do it. He was surprised to feel a smack on his ass and turned around to see her, smiling up at him, batting her eyes, "Good game."

"Good game." He didn't want to reciprocate the ass smack just in case touching her in that manner would be the catalyst that lead to them both being naked, in the middle of the stage, while Chuck Norris' beard took pictures. He decided to change the subject since his brain was able to focus on dirty thoughts again, "What did the pretty boy want?" He had seen her with Jesse and yet, didn't storm across the stage to drag her away like a caveman, beating his chest along the way. He was maturing and she was proud of him for it. Although, she found herself half wanting Jesse to try to talk to her again. She kind of liked territorial Puck.

"To congratulate me and let me know he wanted me back." She said it like it was no big deal and wiped non-existent dirt from the front of his shirt, just another excuse to touch him.

"And what did you say?" He reached out and wiped the same non-existent dirt from her shoulder.

"No, thank you." One less ass to have to kick, and yet, one of the few he was looking forward to kicking. She looked down shyly then back up at him, "So, when you said 'later', how much later did you have in mind?" Where was this Rachel Berry last year? Flirtatious, confident, badass…oh, that's right, pining away for Hudson left her insecure and unhappy all the time. He liked his Rachel Berry much better than Hudson's but, he had to admit, he was in love with both of them.

She really hoped she wasn't being presumptuous about what was going to be happening later. He leaned down and spoke softly in her ear as she enjoyed his proximity, "I meant, when we get back to the motel and I can shut the door and have you to myself, without worrying about anyone watching us or trying to come between us because, once this starts…" He gestured between the two of them, "There's no stopping it. It's going to be a Jewpocalypse of massive proportions that the rest of the world won't be ready for until we've had _at least _twelve, uninterrupted, hours to harness and control the sheer epicness that is Rachel and Noah." Definitely not being presumptuous.

She raised her eyebrows at him, "Twelve hours?"

"At least."

"Then, I suggest we start wrapping this up and get back to the motel as soon as possible."

"Agreed." They had been using hushed voices so it startled her when he looked up quickly and yelled, "Alright people, great show but it's getting late. Get your shit and get your asses in the van!"

"Actually," Kristin stated, looking up from her conversation with Artie, "We were talking about it and we'd like to take you and your families out on the town."

Eve added, "Yeah, your teacher said you won't get to stay in the city so we thought we'd squeeze an accelerated tour in for you tonight."

"Nothing wild." Matt assured the parents, "Just dinner then maybe a few sights. New York is beautiful at night." He smiled down at Finn's mother.

"It sure is." She replied, staring up at him with a dreamy expression and a sigh.

"I don't feel good Mr. Schue," There was no way Puck was wasting time touring a city he could give two shits about when there were things to do and a person to do them with, "Can I go back to the motel?"

"I'm not feeling great either." Rachel added quickly.

Her Daddy put his hand on her forehead, "Maybe you should come back to our hotel with us tonight." Puck tried not to glare at the man.

"That's not necessary. I'm sure all I need is to get out of these uncomfortable clothes and into bed." Puck began coughing, having choked on his own spit, and saw her fighting back a smile. Rachel Berry was screwing with him and he loved it.

His mother rushed over and felt his forehead for a temperature as well, "Noah, you're burning up. Maybe Mr. Berry has the right idea and you should come stay with me for the night." Rachel held back another grin.

"You know what? I actually feel much better and I think we should get going right now if we want to catch all the sights and get back to our rooms at a decent time. Some of us are looking forward to getting into bed tonight." He walked away mumbling something about how the universe is a fickle bitch that's back to hating him again.

"What was that about?" Puck's mother asked Rachel.

"No idea." She smiled at the woman and left to follow him to the van.

They rode next to each other but missed the back row, since Rachel wasn't enforcing her crazy seating arrangements anymore, and settled for the third row. Of course after Puck, once again, assisted Artie into the van. That sight would never get old, especially since they were all still in costume and his wife beater wasn't leaving anything to the imagination.

Santana walked up to Rachel again but, before she could say anything, Rachel beat her to it, still staring at Puck, "I'm working on it."

"Good girl." Santana replied simply, stepping up into the van with Brittany.

Finn and Quinn occupied the row behind them and he stared, or glared, at the backs of their heads as Rachel sat too close to Puck then let her head rest on his shoulder. He narrowed his eyes in anger when he saw his 'friend' lean his head down onto hers.

At the restaurant, she was swept away to sit next to her fathers while his mother pulled him with her. He was going to protest until he realized she was dragging him over to sit across from Rachel, Dad, and Daddy. He should have expected as much and guessed his mother probably already had appointments to meet with wedding caterers and florists to plan the Puckerman-Berry wedding of…Stop thinking about weddings! Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex! Get back on your game Puckerman! Then again, once you're married, you pretty much get to have all the sex you want so, yeah, one point goes to marriage for that. Then it would probably get another point for how beautiful she would look in that white dress, walking down the aisle toward him…Damn it! Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex!

Their food came and he almost choked on a fry when he felt a foot rubbing up and down his leg. He hoped it was Rachel because Sam was on the other side of Daddy, giving him that weird look again, but Rachel wasn't looking at him at all, just speaking casually with his mother and her dad about one of the women in temple who throws herself at Rabbi Burgman in an undignified manner. He had to know, so he reached down and wrapped his fingers around the foot, glad to see Rachel's eyes meet his right that second and smile. She was screwing with him again. His Rachel Berry was awesome.

"Just making sure it wasn't Evans." He said out loud, no one but Rachel knowing what he was talking about.

After dinner, their parents left them to their sightseeing, and went back to their hotels with a long round of hugs, pats on the back, and numerous declarations of pride. Once outside, Rachel linked her arm in Pucks and followed along as their celebrity tour guides pointed out the things to do and see in Times Square. Instead of paying attention, since she was confident of the fact that she'd be here again in the near future, she chose to let her mind wonder about all the possibilities that 'later' held.

Once the van parked at the motel a few hours later, Will and Emma disappeared, leaving the kids to make it to their rooms and go to bed. What the hell kind of chaperones were they? Leaving a van full of teenagers unsupervised? Puck wasn't really going to complain and carried Artie out of the van, at Rachel's insistence, then offered his hand to help her step out. She took it with a smile and, once on the ground, intertwined her fingers with his and wrapped her other hand around his upper arm as they walked. He finally made it. They were so close to the door to his room that he was shaking with anticipation. When the hell did he start shaking? Especially out of anticipation. Then, without warning, yet another, obstacle emerged in the form of Finn Hudson's fist connecting with his face.

"Noah!" Rachel exclaimed, dropping to the ground at his side.

"We agreed you were going to stay away from her." Finn looked down at him. The rest of the Glee Club watched in surprise, no one stepping in to do anything, but no one wanting to not see how this ended.

"Five on Puck." Mike spoke quietly, never looking away from the scene. No one took his bet.

"And why would he have to stay away from her?" Quinn asked, arms crossed, staring her boyfriend down, "I mean, they're two single-"

"Sexy as shit." Puck added getting off the ground with Rachel standing by his side. He couldn't resist.

"Sure." She agreed quickly and Rachel took it as the closest thing to a compliment she'd get from the girl, "...people and, the way I see it, they're more than free to lock themselves up in one of those rooms and screw each others brains out if they so choose. Now, unless you have a problem with that, I suggest you get out of their way." Puck knew there was something about Quinn that he liked, and it wasn't just the fact that she got drunk enough, off two wine coolers, to give it up to him. Which, looking back, he kind of felt terrible about. This whole having a conscience thing sucked a little bit.

"You don't understand Quinn. He's going to take advantage of her, just like he does with every other girl who's stupid enough to not see him for what he really is."

"Like me."

"What?"

"You're saying I'm stupid."

"No! That's not what I meant."

"The what did you mean?"

Puck and Rachel briefly looked between the pair, watching them argue before she took advantage of the distraction, grabbed his hand, and pulled them away just to be stopped by another fist to his face.

"Are you shitting me?" He asked in frustration then stared up at the skay, "Come on!" He focused his attention on the fact that Lauren Zizes was hovering over him, Rachel again kneeling to help him.

"So this was why you needed to break up with me." The club was now torn between Finn and Quinn's screaming match and the second fight forming right before their eyes.

"Five on Zizes." Mike said. Again, no one taking the bet.

Puck stood up quickly and put himself between Lauren and Rachel, "Do what you want to me Lauren, but leave Rachel alone." He closed his eyes tightly, waiting for the blow that would knock him out until well after graduation, when Rachel would leave for New York and forget all about the boy in a coma who was this close to having a shot with her. The guy who should have ignored Mr. Schuester the night before Nationals and kissed the shit out of her when he saw the look in her eyes after finding out he was single. The guy who should have pinned her against the wall in the hallway after seeing her outburst at the stuck up bitches who made fun of her friends. The guy who sat next to her in a dark theater all day and didn't do anything but think about how good her hair smelled and how awesome it was going to be to roll up in school on Monday with her on his arm. That guy was a pussy who deserved to get knocked out.

"You're chivalry is appreciated Noah, but won't be necessary." Rachel stepped in front of him to face Lauren. Was Rachel Berry seriously about to defend his honor? Just when he thought she couldn't get any hotter, she stands in front of the female version of him (except tougher, stronger, and all around scarier) and doesn't even flinch. And here he was trying to push thoughts of marriage out of his head. To hell with that, he'd marry her tonight if she'd have him.

Santana watched the scene unfold and grew excited at the prospect of seeing The Berry Crusher re-emerge. That bitch was crazy and, with Britt as her girlfriend now, she was in the market for a new best friend. Then she realized she owed Rachel one for sticking up for them and that, in that simple act, the girl may have already slipped into her best friend spot. Now she'd probably have to have sleepovers and watch dance recitals or whatever but she didn't seem to mind all that much. And damn if she was going to let her new best friend die before she could get laid!

"Britt, I'm about to get my ass beat for Rachel Berry. The world has officially gone mad."

"If I were the world, and everyone walked all over me all the time, I'd be mad too." Brittany admitted, watching Santana exhale deeply, roll her shoulders, crack her neck from side to side, then step into the thick of things.

"Yo, Zizes! Glad you've finally decided to join us." She looked at Rachel then moved her gaze to the rooms, signaling to them to get out of there. They didn't have to be told twice as Puck dragged her to his room, pushed the door shut, put the deadbolt on, secured the chain, then pushed the TV stand in front of the door.

"What about the window?" Rachel asked.

"Right." He looked around the room then headed for the bed closest to the door and grabbed the mattress. She walked over to him and put her hand on his forearm causing him to let go and allowing her to press her body against his.

She gazed up at him, "I was joking."

"I'm not." She watched, amused, as he continued with his task, dragging the mattress off the bed, then leaning it against the window. He stared at his work briefly, waiting for something ridiculous, like an army of Zombies to burst through either entrance and try to stop the moment he had been waiting all day for from happening. After a full minute, he relaxed and turned to face her. Now that they were alone in the room, he had no idea what to do with her. Well, he knew what he wanted to do and what he normally would have done but this was Rachel and he was terrified of messing things up with her.

"So…today was interesting." That's the understatement of the century.

He laughed but had no idea what to say in response because all the words that were filling his head were cheesy, stupid, and not worthy of Rachel Berry. Instead, he did the only thing he could think to do that didn't involve words, but would still show her how he felt. He crossed the room to her in two long strides, recreated the final moment from their performance together, his hand tangled in her hair and his other hand on her hip, then crashed his lips into hers.

She was startled by the boldness of his move but gladly opened her mouth to welcome his home. After several minutes, he backed her up until her legs made contact with the edge of the bed and was surprised when it was her who pulled him down onto the mattress. Again, his Rachel…awesome.

They stayed there for a few more minutes, hands wandering, one of his ended up under her shirt but resting just above her hip and her hands snaked their way up the back of his shirt as her fingers ran up and down his back. He came to his senses, pulled his lips from hers, and she lifted her head from the pillow to try to reclaim them, "Wait." She opened her eyes in confusion, "This is wrong."

"Oh." She dropped her head down and looked as if she had been slapped in the face, "Okay." Insecure Rachel re-emerged and damn Finn Hudson for making Insecure Rachel such a prevalent part of her personality. He'd definitely be getting his ass kicked at some point in the near future. Puck would have done it out in the parking lot ten minutes ago if he didn't have more important matters to deal with, "I'll just go." She attempted to sit up but he pushed her back down.

"That's not what I meant…don't be stupid." Again, a slap in the face.

"So I'm stupid now too?"

He rolled his eyes, "Christ, Berry, just shut up and listen for a minute. I'm trying very hard to be the charming, caring guy you deserve but you're making that shit extremely difficult." Apparently, he hadn't changed as much as she thought and yet, she was almost relieved by that fact.

"So eloquent Noah." He gave her a look that told her to keep her mouth shut and she did.

He brought his hand up, resting it on her neck and gently rubbed his thumb across her cheek, "From the time I shut that door to when we ended up here which, trust me, is where I am more than happy to be…I skipped a step."

"What step?" She asked, back under his spell.

He looked like he didn't know where to start, stared down at the bed spread, and moved his hand from her neck, down her arm, to stop at her hip, "The step where I tell you…" He stopped then growled in frustration, "Shit, I hate words." She bit her bottom lip and waited, knowing he wasn't done. Finally, almost in a whisper, he began singing to the hem of her shirt that he was now tracing with his fingertips, "_Well, all I really want to do is love you. A kind much closer than friends use. But I still can't say it after all we've been through._" He trailed off at the end and clamped his mouth shut, afraid he said too much.

Wait. What? Was Noah Puckerman trying to tell her he was in love with her? She couldn't just say "I love you too" because, what if she misinterpreted the meaning behind his actions. It wouldn't be the first time she had looked too far into something a boy said to her. What if it was just his way of being, as he said, 'charming and caring', trying to be someone he thought she deserved.

Still, what if he meant it and she didn't say it back? What if he was waiting for her to say it back? Even though she knew, the things he'd been doing to her mentally and physically were love, it was too soon for her to be declaring it…right? It took her a few seconds to choose her course of action. She put her hand on his cheek, pulling his gaze back to hers and sang quietly, "_And all I really want from you is to feel me. As the feeling inside keeps building. And I will find a way to you if it kills me._"

She registered the look on his face as relief before his lips found their way to hers again, not in a crash this time but in a calm, gentle graze that held the promise of saying the actual words hidden behind what they sang to each other for later. It was followed by another soft kiss, then one more before she whimpered and ran her tongue along his bottom lip, convincing him to say to hell with being gentle.

They stayed that way most of the night, connected at the lips and limbs tangling together in a comfortable dance. Well after their shirts came off, when Rachel surprised him by asking if he had protection, he realized things were moving very quickly and forced himself to stop. Which was difficult because he was still Puck and she was still a half naked, beautiful woman laying under him, asking if he had a condom. She looked hurt for a second before he explained he wasn't ready and he wanted it to be, "Special or whatever". He then picked her shirt up, pulled it back over her head, and was content to lay there, her practically on top of him, and his arms wrapped securely around her. They drifted in and out of sleep, waking up to explore each others lips throughout the night and, sometime before sunrise, her shirt made its way to the floor again.

Morning came and they decided it was a good idea to join the others before Mr. Schuester came looking and found them rounding second. Which is where they were headed before Puck managed to, once again, find the self control necessary to stop. They slipped out of his room, hand in hand, to go to her room where they found everybody but Finn, Quinn, Lauren, and their chaperones sleeping peacefully. Why Sam was positioned on a bed between Kurt and Blaine, they'll never know and he'll never tell but said something about not being able to beat KUBLAM!

Puck sat in one of the chairs at the small table next to the window and pulled Rachel down on his lap, noticing Santana and Brittany spooned together under the table. She snuggled up against him and they waited for their friends to wake up. It didn't take long since Kurt was the first to open his eyes, take in the sight of them and ask in an excited, loud tone, "It's official?"

Santana shot up at the exclamation, smacking her head on the table in the process, "Shit!" She squinted her eyes then looked up at their positioning, "Please tell me it was worth me getting slammed into a snack machine over."

"The upside to that," Artie gestured to all the empty candy and chip wrappers scattered around room, "Free snacks."

"No," Santana corrected, "The upside to that better be that my girl got a piece last night."

Rachel was stunned at Santana's declaration of friendship and knew she couldn't let her down after what she had done for them. She almost managed to not blush when she said, "Well, this is Noah Puckerman we're talking about." Had she really just implied to all these people that she and Puck had sex? Sacrificing her rep to save his. He suddenly regretted not screaming that he loved her in the middle of Times Square for everyone to hear. She told him later, just before they climbed into the van, after Quinn pushed Finn forward to apologize and Lauren started to charge toward them before Mercedes, Tina, Santana, and Brittany stepped in front of her, glaring at the girl until she backed off, that it wasn't a lie. Not only did she get a piece but she got the whole thing. That was then met with an extremely vulgar, yet impressively descriptive explanation of what the 'whole thing' entailed and how she was going to be getting it, in it's entirety, very soon.

END


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